Ways To Protest a War In Iraq

Well, boys and girls, it looks like war against Iraq is at hand! Bush has made some really dumb decisions before, but this time he really did it!

If you've read this far, chances are you oppose this impending war as much as I do, although there's not much we can do about it. There are a few things we can do to show support for the antiwar movement and let our voices be heard. Here are a few of them:

Contact your representatives and senators in Congress.  If they oppose the war, let them know you're behind them. If they support, plead with them to change their mi. . . .on second thought, don't bother - they're not likely to change their minds. Just say the one thing that will strike fear into the hearts of these pro-war politicians. Tell them you're not voting for them next time they're up for re-election.

Contact the White House. Let the W. administration know in no uncertain terms what you think of their war policy. Try -really try - to keep it civil.

Buy French products. Since France is so steadfastly opposed to attacking Iraq, show the French how much you agree with them by buying their stuff. Buy some Pierre Cardin cologne or Chanel perfume. See Catherine Deneuve's latest movie when it's out on video - heck, buy it if you like it enough! Drink Bordeaux wines and Kronenbourg beer! Get a Cardin or Lagerfeld outfit! Don't bother buying a French car like a Peugeot or Renault, though - they don't sell French cars in America anymore and besides, even if they did, they're unreliable anyway. I was cycling down a street one day and I actually saw a headlight fall out of a Peugeot sedan at a stop sign!

Buy a Nissan. Renault owns 44 percent of Nissan. And Nissans are so reliable, your headlights are guaranteed not to fall out!

Attend anti-war demonstrations. Go. Carry a sign. Bring your friends. Some friends and relatives might try to dissuade you on the grounds that it's not safe and that you could get arrested or be a terrorist victim. But you probably have a better chance of being hit by a car than getting in trouble at a demonstration. However, you do have a greater chance of getting into trouble at a demonstration than being hit by a Peugeot, because there are so damn few left in this country.

Buy records from pop performers who oppose the war.  That's right - buy Sheryl Crow records. But don't bother with the Dixie Chicks - they apologized under pressure for badmouthing Bush, so now they have no credibility. There's your trouble!

Hopefully, this crisis will pass soon with minimal tragedy. But even as you hope for the best, prepare for the worst. Peace be with you. And as New York's asinine governor George Pataki said in response to the latest terror alerts, have fun! ):-(