The 2026 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Nominees Explained

There's a group of racial extremists who fellow a tenet of faith generally downplayed by mainstream media.  This group believes that white men are the greatest villains on earth. They believe that white men were the result of a botched experiment from the days of creation, the experiment conducted by a wicked deity.  They charge that the white man is guilty of cultural colonialism and they repeatedly declare that they find the white man guilty as charged.  These people believe that white men were given domination of the earth but that a time would come when, after seventy years, the white men would lose their domination of the earth and be condemned to a richly deserved downfall and be forced to pay for their sins by being forced to accept everything that is anathema to them before they would be finally wiped from the face of the earth.

These people are called . . . pop-music critics. 

Not an original thought, I concede - I read it in either Blender or Spin - but when you look at most of the non-rock-and-roll acts being nominated for induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (and Jethro Tull have been snubbed again) and you recall that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's board is dominated by  pop-music critics . . . 

. . .the list makes total sense.

Brought to you by the same people who inducted Madonna the second she became eligible two years before they inducted the Hollies, who had been eligible since 1964.

It's 2026 - seventy years after Elvis Presley became a star.

That is all. 

Too "Late" For the Hall

It finally happened.  Joe Cocker, who died in 2014, is finally getting inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame this year.

Now, I have largely stopped commenting on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame as a rule, mainly because I thought it jumped the shark long ago with dubious inductions and a very, very, very loose definition of rock and roll to include dance-pop singers and to include rappers in the name of "diversity."  But I have to say that Joe Cocker's induction this year is well-deserved.  It is altogether fitting that I should say so.

It is also appropriate that I should applaud the induction of Bad Company, one of the very few rock supergroups that lived (note tense) up to the promise of and the hype over their formation.  And I do.  But the induction comes in retrospect of BadCo frontman Paul Rodgers' well-founded suspicion of the very idea of a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  When record producer Ahmet Ertegun, in 1986, helped Jann Wenner get the project going, he asked Rodgers for his support.  Rodgers, then in Jimmy Page's post-Led Zeppelin group the Firm (which was as much an embarrassing disappointment as Bad Company was not), declined the opportunity.  Rock and roll, he said at the time, wasn't something to be celebrated in a museum but instead was a living, breathing entity that had a spirit meant to be celebrated by playing the records or performing your own music rather than building a fancy temple in which to honor it.  (I'm liberally paraphrasing here.)  

Something must have happened to make Rodgers acquiesce to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's mission to honor rock and roll musicians by means other than playing a record or taking in (or putting on) a show.  Oh, right,  rap exploded and smug stars of that pop form take pleasure in seeing rock decline and fall and in seeing its younger practitioners live in their parents' basements and getting nowhere because no record label wants to sign a new rock band these days and, besides, the old veterans are still bankable acts.  In short, rock is not a living, breathing entity anymore.

Even if rock were still as relevant as it used to be and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame weren't the joke it has become, I still would be as much in favor of Bad Company's induction as I am now.  I'm only sorry it didn't happen sooner.  Bad Company guitarist Mick Ralphs, who had previously been in Mott the Hoople, died recently, leaving Rodgers and drummer Simon Kirke - both of whom had been in Free - the only surviving members of the original 1974-1982 lineup.  (Bassist Boz Burrell died in 2006.)  The belated and posthumous inductions of Joe Cocker and Bad Company's Mick Ralphs are, in a sadly ironic way, just another reason why the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame can no longer be taken seriously. 

Gypsies, Tramps, Thieves and Rock and Roll

I stopped commenting on the annual Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees after 2022 when Duran Duran - whom Jimmy Guterman and Owen O'Donnell in their book "The Worst Rock & Roll Records of All Time" said was the worst rock band ever (they're not, but they're pretty damn close) - got in.  But I just had to come back to comment on the latest big-name induction . . .

Cher?

Cher?  

Don't get me wrong.  I love Cher.  Really.  Just about everybody loves Cher.  She's a strong singer.  She's also a good actress.  She's had numerous hits, and many of her songs are underrated.  She herself is underrated.  Dave Marsh actually once dismissed her as someone more famous for being than for doing, a charge she dispelled when she won the 1988 Best Actress Oscar for her role in Moonstruck.  She's a woman of many accomplishments.  You can't take any of that away from her.  But - and you knew I was coming to a "but" - she isn't rock and roll.  She's pop!  Her only connections to rock and roll are her romantic associations with Gregg Allman and Gene Simmons, and the latter association is questionable not because of her but because of Simmons. 

The fact that Cher is being inducted 34 years after becoming eligible (she released her debut solo album in 1965, when she was only 19 years old) has led to many people charging the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame with sexism for the long wait.  That's the sort of cudgel everyone uses when they charge prejudice for a judgment call instead of looking at more pertinent reasons, like quality or style.  And I've made similar arguments against inductions of male - white male - artists like the Bee Gees or James Taylor, because they're more pop than rock, as well as the aforementioned Duran Duran because, well, they suck.  Oh, Duran Duran are rock and roll all right, but they're bad rock and roll.  Musical ineptitude should never be honored by the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame - but Kiss are in anyway.

I'm not going to say that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame board members inducted Cher to own the rockists, because Peter Frampton - who was not a critic's favorite back in the day - finally got inducted this year as well.  I'm thinking there was a transactional compromise in which rockist members of the Rock Hall board agreed to let Cher get in as a price to pay to allow Frampton's induction.  But no transactional compromise, however carefully crafted, will ever allow Jethro Tull to be inducted.

Oh well, I'm still glad Foreigner got in, an induction I've always argued was necessary on the basis of Lou Gramm's voice alone, and I'm happy to celebrate the induction of Kool and the Gang (see what I did there?). 

Wenner The Weenie

You knew I wasn't finished roasting Jann Wenner, didn't you?

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, on whose board Wenner served before he was unceremoniously ousted from his seat following his racist and sexist comments to the New York Times, has been roundly criticized for inducting performers who aren't really rock and roll but are more pop and MOR - and of course, rappers have also been inducted.  Perversely, people who grouse about the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's inductions of such performers have been dismissed as racist and sexist because women and people of color make up the majority of Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductions the Hall's detractors grouse about.  Many pop critics have openly advocated for the inductions of rappers, arguing that rock and roll, which started as black music, and hip-hop, a modern expression of black identity, are part of the "rock and rap" (as Dave Marsh now calls rock and roll) continuum.  These same critics push for the induction of pop divas in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame by arguing that the definition of rock and roll as electric-guitar-based music that is mostly performed by white males is too narrow and too exclusionary toward women.  Also, ironically, many of them agree with Jann Wenner on who should not be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame - namely, white male rock bands and solo performers that the critics have detested for years for being too pretentious or too commercial.

In other words, Wenner is just as much to blame for why Madonna got inducted the second she was eligible and why Jethro Tull and Foreigner are still waiting for their turn long after they became eligible as the critics who vote on inductions.  But while the critics have been greatly responsible for keeping various artists out, Wenner is still the top Katzenjammer Kid here.  It is true, for example, that the critics universally detest Grand Funk Railroad, but that's not the only reason they're not in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  Wenner apparently had an argument with Grand Funk manager Terry Knight, and he's held a grudge against the band ever since.  Wenner is also believed to dislike progressive, or "art," rock, putting him in solidarity with the critics, who despise art rock for being too far removed from rhythm and blues, the main root of rock and roll, so that means no induction for Emerson, Lake and Palmer.   

As someone who agrees that Grand Funk Railroad and Emerson, Lake and Palmer were two of the most boring rock and roll trios of all time and only put out a good song or two once in a blue moon, I don't think they belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  But there are a lot of artists who have been shut out that do belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  Not just the aforementioned Jethro Tull but Bad Company, the Guess Who, and Supertramp, among others, and also Joe Cocker.  Imagine - Joe Cocker, who released one of the most essential debut albums and one of the most essential second albums of all time, and both in the same year (1969), hasn't been inducted yet.  (Why?  Seeing as Joe Cocker was a critic's favorite as well as part of the canon of classic rock, the reason his non-induction remains a mystery, unless he's been dismissed for culturally appropriating Ray Charles' style.)  And yes, Foreigner should be inducted too, because Lou Gramm's voice alone should qualify them.

Wenner influenced induction nominations based on his own personal prejudices and grudges.  The female pop singers and black rappers who got in were not just nods to political correctness but were inducted based on their drawing power to the induction ceremony.  Joe Cocker can't draw as many people to buy induction ceremony tickets as Madonna did, mainly because he's dead.  And the reason bands such as Family or Lindisfarne, as well as other British bands with mere cult followings in America, will never get in is not because Wenner hates them; he's never even heard of them.  Not even a black American funk-rock band like Bloodstone - one of critic Dave Marsh's favorite acts of the seventies - can get in, and for the same reason.  

Wenner's dubious understanding of rock and roll extends to how he ran Rolling Stone.  When the magazine marked its twentieth anniversary in 1987 by taking a poll of its critics to determine the one hundred best albums of the previous two decades (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band came out on top), the second best album was the Sex Pistols' only LP, Never Mind the Bollocks, Here's the Sex Pistols, a choice Wenner did not  agree with.  He couldn't fathom a punk album making number two on the poll because he thought punk smelled like number two.  Whom did Wenner think got snubbed?  

Loggins and Messina.

Loggins . . . and Messina.  

He also wanted to know why Hotel California, the 1976 album from the Eagles - a band Rolling Stone's critics had long despised with a cold passion - wasn't on the list.  Look, I like the Eagles, and even I wouldn't consider Hotel California to be one of the best albums of the twenty-year period beginning in 1967.  I wouldn't even consider it to be the best album of 1976 - a year that also saw the release of Boz Scaggs' Silk Degrees and Bob Seger's Night Moves.  As for Loggins and Messina, Wenner was angry about their shutout mainly because Jim Messina was one of his buddies.   

Yes, some female readers wrote letters to the editor to complain about the dearth of women on the list, but at least the poll was honest.  Not so much the 1988 Rolling Stone poll of the one hundred best singles of the previous twenty-five years.  I have noted Wenner's friendship with Billy Joel and Foreigner's Mick Jones; it was because of those associations that Wenner deliberately interfered with the poll to ensure that Foreigner's 1984 single "I Want To Know What Love Is" and Billy Joel's 1983 single "Uptown Girl" were included on the list (at number 54 and number 99, respectively), which meant pushing Stevie Wonder's "Superstition" from the top ten down to number 73.

I like Foreigner's record, but it's not one of the best singles of the 1963-1988 time frame.  And "Uptown Girl"?  I know Frankie Valli praised Joel's Four Seasons pastiche, but I can think of a bunch of better singles from 1983 than that - no mean feat, considering the lameness of eighties pop.

In a further exposure of Wenner's duplicity and lack of integrity, the New York Daily News rated "Uptown Girl" at number 99 in a readers' poll of the one hundred worst songs of the previous quarter century that was run in 1988 as a response to Rolling Stone's list.  This poll has more validity than the best-singles list Rolling Stone put out, because it was voted on by common folk and not manipulated by Jann Wenner.   

There are some people who suspect that classic rock acts long snubbed by the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame will get in now that Wenner is out. Don't bet on it.  If that were true, Rolling Stone would have bounced back after Wenner left, not deteriorated even further into irrelevance.  (His son Gus runs it.)  Wenner himself selected several board members of the Rock Hall, including current board chairman  and media mogul John Sykes, and the critics who vote on inductions and who hated prog and arena rock when Wenner was around still hate prog and arena rock today.  And they can be counted on to continue to induct pop divas and rappers to push their politically correct definition of rock and roll and also to "own the rockists" - rockists being people who think that pop divas and rappers don't qualify as rockers because pop divas are too lightweight and rappers don't play instruments or sing.  When her time comes, Taylor Swift will be inducted.  When his time comes, Kanye West will be inducted.  And, because she's a female Puerto Rican and therefore not to induct her would be an act of bigotry, Cardi B, when her time comes, will also be inducted.  Joe Cocker won't be.  Dead men sell no induction ceremony tickets.    

If you want to honor rockers snubbed by the Rock and Roll Hall Fame, play their records.  Me listening to Family's 1969 album Family Entertainment - and owning the poster that came with the original vinyl record - is as good as any Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction.  

Hit Me With Your Worst Shot

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees for 2022 have been announced, and they will be formally inducted in Los Angeles (wait isn't the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland? Ahh, well, so were the Rams) on November 5. Rather than wait until then to offer my comments on the nominees, I'm going to do it now.  And not because November 5 is my birthday - my last Saturday birthday until 2033 - and I plan to be out celebrating that night (yeah, right!), but for another reason I will reveal at the end of this post.

First, let me tell you who didn't get inducted - Kate Bush, Beck, the MC5, Rage Against the Machine, or the New York Dolls. Which actually makes sense - because when you hold the induction ceremony in LA, those are the last acts guaranteed to sell tickets to it.  As further proof that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is more about celebrity than about artistry (well, it is a hall of "fame"), let's look at who was inducted for 2022, possibly the lamest induction class in over a decade:

Dolly Parton.  She's not rock and roll.  Even she says she's not rock and roll.  She asked the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to withdraw her nomination. But they didn't listen!

Pat Benatar.  A boring singer who mostly sang about broken hearts with just-add-water AOR arrangements. Guys who were horny teenage boys in the eighties who were turned on by dames in spandex outfits are the only ones who will applaud this.

Eminem.  Black or white, all rappers should be ineligible for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame because they are, aesthetically, as much rock and roll as Dolly Parton.

Eurythmics.  Annie Lennox deserves too be inducted as a solo artist for her impeccable work. Dave Stewart deserves to be inducted as producer for his work with Ringo Starr, Bryan Ferry and Tom Petty, among others.  But they shouldn't be inducted as the Eurythmics. "Would I Lie To You?" is the only worthy record they ever made together.  As a duo, they're the anti-Loggins and Messina - they function better separately than together. 

Lionel Richie.  Look, I'll admit that Lionel Richie can rock out in subtle ways.  "Easy (Like Sunday Morning)," his 1977 hit with the Commodores, is a power ballad that would fit in snugly on AOR radio.  His solo hit "All Night Long" from 1983 is an infectious pop-rock tune you could imagine Phil Collins covering.  But he's put out so many soppy ballads that there's a reason why I call him the Motown Manilow. 

Carly Simon.  I'm on the fence about this one.  I like her hit singles, expect for "You're So Vain," which I love.  But does she rock out enough?  Probably more than her ex-husband James Taylor, but it's a tough call.  I'm inclined to say yes to this one.

Duran Duran.  I . . . think the world just ended.

Some of the award recipients in the subcategories are another mess.  Because Judas Priest couldn't get in as full-fledged inductees, they were given a Musical Excellence Award for 2022 along with R&B songwriters and producers Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis.  Is Dave Marsh still on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's board?  Because I would love to know how the man who once said Judas Priest was "for lovers of recycled Led Zeppelin riffs only" explains this.

Calypso singer Harry Belafonte and the late folk-blues guitarist and singer Elizabeth Cotten both get the 2022 Early Influence Award, which makes sense, and giving producer Jimmy Iovine an Ahmet Ertegun Award makes sense as well, but giving the Ahmet Ertegun Award to singer turned hip-hop mogul Sylvia Robinson does not.  (She wasn't even a great singer.)  And that same award is also going to . . .  Allen Grubman?  A lawyer?  Because his clients include pop stars such as Bruce Springsteen, Madonna and Mariah Carey? What did he represent them in, their divorce cases? Actually, he's getting it because he is, as Newsweek once called him, "perhaps the music industry's wealthiest and most powerful attorney."  Oh.

So why am I going through all of this now instead of waiting until November?  I've long since been resigned to the fact that my criticisms of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame don't matter, and I know that the Hall is considered sacrosanct enough by so many people that for Dolly Parton to refuse her induction despite her own wishes would be like a cardinal refusing the papacy after being chosen for it.  But the direction of the Hall has been hijacked by proponents of a broader definition of rock and roll who want to include popular music that doesn't have the slightest resemblance to rock and who want to "own the rockists" - that is, drive crazy those of us WTFing all over social media when someone like a pop diva or a rapper gets inducted at the expense of classic-rock stalwarts who won't even get nominated. Since most rockists tend to be white guys who grew up listening to AOR in the seventies and eighties who prefer a Leslie West guitar riff to a Kanye West autotuning, owning the rockists has become a popular indoor sport.

Therefore . . . I'm through commenting on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  Don't expect me to bring it up in 2023, 2024 or beyond.  Even if Jethro Tull do get inducted (yeah, right!).  It's too late for that.  I've had enough.  The Hall's board members' refusal to abide by Dolly Parton's wishes and remove her from contention shows what a bunch of pricks they really are.  Jimmy Guterman and Owen O'Donnell said it for all time: "The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is an oxymoron. If you want your work to be recognized in a museum, learn to paint."

So . . . I think I'll be . . . I'm quitting . . .  Rock and Roll Hall of Fame commentary now.  

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was originally established to honor rock and roll performers but has since gone on to include performers representing a variety of pop styles.  See you 'round the clubs. 😛

There They Go Again

Dolly Parton is stone country.  To many people too young to remember Patsy Cline, Dolly Parton is country music.  So it was just as amusing to her as it was to everyone else when the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame nominated her for the 2022 class of inductees.  As with their rap nominees and inductees, the Parton nomination sent a twofold message to classic-rock fans: We're more aware of the diversity and diverse influences of rock and roll than you are, and the reason we haven't nominated your favorite acts is because we hate their guts.

Parton appreciated the nomination but said that she wanted to decline it on the grounds that she never made a straight rock and roll album, though she has covered rock songs such as Led Zeppelin's "Stairway To Heaven" and Collective Soul's "Shine" (though, the less said about her disco record "Baby I'm Burnin'," the better).  She didn't want her nomination to split the votes in favor of nominees who are straight rock and rollers.

"Even though I’m extremely flattered and grateful to be nominated for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame," she said, "I don't feel that I have earned that right.  I really do not want votes to be split because of me, so I must respectfully bow out."

So, you'd think the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame would respect her wishes and withdraw her name, right? Think again, sucka!  The Hall's board said that they considered Parton rock and roll because her music has inspired so many rockers as well as artists from other genres (well, I do hear an influence of "9 to 5" in the Pointer Sisters' 1984 hit "Neutron Dance").  As the board members explained in this press release to Cleveland's WKYC-TV:

All of us in the music community have seen Dolly Parton’s thoughtful note expressing her feeling that she has not earned the right to be inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. In addition to her incredible talent as an artist, her humility is another reason Dolly is a beloved icon by millions of fans around the world.

From its inception, rock and roll has had deep roots in rhythm and blues and country music. It is not defined by any one genre, rather a sound that moves youth culture. Dolly Parton’s music impacted a generation of young fans and influenced countless artists that followed. Her nomination to be considered for induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame followed the same process as all other artists who have been considered.

Dolly’s nomination, along with the other 16 artists for the class of 2022, was sent out earlier this month to our 1,200 general ballot voters, the majority of whom are artists themselves, for consideration for induction at our ceremony.

We are in awe of Dolly’s brilliant talent and pioneering spirit and are proud to have nominated her for induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.

In other words. they'll do anything to avoid inducting Jethro Tull. 

Oh, by the way, Dolly Parton's music did not "impact" people, it "influenced" them.  By saying it impacted them, the Hall has suggested that her records fall on people like boulders.  I, for one, have never been knocked unconscious by a copy of the Jolene album. 

The board also explained its nominating process: "Nominee ballots are sent to an international voting body of more than 1,000 artists, historians, and members of the music industry.  Factors such as an artist's musical influence on other artists, length and depth of career and the body of work, innovation and superiority in style and technique are taken into consideration."

So I guess the the first factor would eliminate Joe Cocker (more influenced than influencing, and he appropriated Ray Charles), the second factor would eliminate Little Feat (they simply never sold that many records), but then there's the third factor, superiority in style and technique - if that's so important, how come Richard Thompson isn't an inductee and Kiss are?  

All of this goes to show that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame remains under control of arrogant pricks.  They decide what constitutes worthy rock and roll, and the fans' opinions are irrelevant.  Sure, we can vote for inductions, but the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame board still chooses the candidates and no write-ins are allowed (so forget about voting for Family).  They know better than you do.  They know what real rock an roll is.  That's why they inducted Madonna, who can't sing, can't write songs, and can't arrange them with any competence, and why Suzi Quatro is still waiting for a phone call from Cleveland to learn of her nomination.  This sort of elitism begets angry, dangerous populism among the masses.  After all, Hillary Clinton exuded the same sort of elitism in her 2016 presidential campaign, and we all know how that turned out!

Anyway, Dolly Parton is a really classy lady for asking to take herself out of the running, and she knows rock and roll better than the board does (just as, in 9 to 5, her character Dora Lee signed her boss's name better than he did).  But with her name still on the ballot, the best way to honor her wishes is to go to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's site and cast a ballot for someone else.  Right now, she's fourth in the fan vote behind Duran Duran (pretty-boy synth-popsters who wrote songs by stringing random words together), Eminem (black or white, all rappers do nothing but make noise by speaking into a microphone with dial-tone-like noises in the background)  and Pat Benatar (who never would have become a star if she hadn't worn spandex outfits to attract horny suburban white teenage boys). The five artists with the most votes will produce a "fan ballot" that will be counted with the ballots of the "experts" (the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's Electoral College) to determine the inductees.

So go vote for anyone but Dolly . . . and the three "artists" ahead of her.

You know there is one way Dolly could get her name off the ballot.  She could rush-release a cover of Jethro Tull's "Look Into the Sun." 😉 

Hit Me With Your Best Shot

Ladies and gentlemen, the list of nominees for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Class of 2022.

Oh, sure, some of these names make sense, but others just stick out like sore thumbs and leaving scratching your head.  A bland soul crooner like Lionel Richie, whose most exciting song was "All Night Long"?   Dolly Parton, who's stone country?  Noted great white hope Eminem, the performer legally known as Marshall Mathers, whose music is point-blank rap?  Dionne Warwick, who makes Lionel Richie sound like Little Richard by comparison? 

Even some of the acts here that could be undoubtedly classified as rock raise more than a few eyebrows.  Devo?  Those New Wave clowns who simplified social commentary into a song like "Whip It"?  Duran Duran, who watered down New Wave into mindless pop with song lyrics that read like a tile acrostic on a Scrabble board? Pat Benatar, who always sang about broken hearts and served as a sex symbol for horny teenage boys who were too distracted by her one-piece spandex suits to appreciate a real hard-rock queen like Suzi Quatro? 

And of course, the list is notable for the acts that are absent.  Still no Joe Cocker.  Still no Warren Zevon.  No Little Feat, and no Jethro Tull.  

Get used to it.  In this time of "wokeness" and "cancel culture," you can expect the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to continue to add more female and non-white and/or Hispanic artists whose music, however worthy it may be, fits a much looser definition of what rock and roll is, and several more worthy artists who have the misfortune of being male and overwhelmingly white get tossed by the wayside, much like white male Democratic presidential candidates under 75.  There are, I must stress, many female and Hispanic/non-white musicians whose music certainly is rock, and they belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame too, but as long as the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame lays aside aesthetics and style as criteria for induction and concentrates on identity politics, the protests of fans don't matter because the Hall has its own politically correct agenda.  Nominate Joe Cocker?  No, he culturally appropriated Ray Charles's style.  (For the record, Ray Charles is in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and he should be.)  Nominate Warren Zevon? No - too LA, too esoteric.  Little Feat?  No one cares about Little Feat any more.  Tull?  No, the folks who run the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame hate Ian Anderson's guts.

The truth is, the folks who run the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame are by and large the same people who worked as rock critics in the seventies and eighties and consistently slammed and derided mainstream rock acts that are now considered "classic rock" and dismissed album-oriented rock radio as a formulaic radio format devised by conservative businessmen that allowed many a below-average white band to get airplay, which, they opine, never would have happened on a rock radio station that made playlists based on artistic and not commercial reasons.  These critics always hated seventies and eighties rock culture and everyone who merrily participated in it, thus producing Peter Frampton, prog, and heavy metal; Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductions of artists not thought of as rock by anyone connected to that culture are these critics' revenge on rock acts and fans they detested.  And even though the critics never liked Duran Duran, I assume they've been nominated because the Hall wants to tick off the classic-rock crowd, which hated Duran Duran with a passion.

And folks like comedian and podcaster Joe Kwaczala have no problem with any of that.  "I get a lot of sh-- on my podcast,"Kwaczala wrote, "for claiming the 'roll' part of the term includes genres like R&B, soul, funk, and hip-hop," he writes. "But I think I’m right, and it appears the Hall agrees: Acts like Whitney Houston, Bill Withers, and Jay-Z. have recently been inducted, to name a few. So cry as you might that they’re 'not rock and roll,' but the point is moot. The ship has sailed, and there’s no coming back. And honestly, if it’s a ship that's playing Tupac Shakur (Class of 2017) and Nina Simone (Class of 2018), then it's a ship worth being on."

If Kwaczala wants to turn this debate into a question of race - see who he listed there? - he's entitled to do that.  I'll be the first person to say that Bill Withers belongs in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and an argument can certainly be made for Nina Simone.  But if Kwaczala's ship also makes room for white performers like Duran Duran and Madonna, plus any rapper you'd care to name, I'm going to head for the lifeboats.

Let's see who actually gets inducted.  I'm rooting for Beck, the New York Dolls, and Rage Against the Machine.  As for snubs like Little Feat and Jethro Tull, I'm inclined to believe that if they ever got on Kwaczala's ship, he'd push them overboard.

What's Rock Got To Do With It?

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, its credibility in tatters since it started inducting non-rock performers - and Madonna's induction in 2008 was a moment the Hall pole-vaulted over the shark - just inducted its 2021 class this past Saturday, October 30, and it was probably the biggest pre-Halloween joke to be broadcast since Orson Wells and the Mercury Theater presented an Americanized version of  "War Of the Worlds" on that same day in 1938.

Oh, all right, the 2021 class isn't a total waste of time.  Many worthy performers got in, and some of them were long overdue for induction. One inductee was in her eighties, which means that if you wait long enough, you'll get your due.  Except for Dave Clark Five lead singer Mike Smith, who died just before the band was inducted in 2008, a couple of years after they should have been because, in the earlier year, another act was inducted instead because it could be guaranteed to sell more tickets to the induction ceremony.

And oh yes, a couple of rappers got honored, and British bands known for their folk-based, esoteric power ballads (*cough cough*, Jethro Tull, *cough cough*, Fairport Convention, *cough cough*) did not, for various reasons (*cough cough*, political correctness, *cough cough*, rock and roll cancel culture, *cough cough*), but then there's always 2022 (*cough cough*, not on your life, *cough cough*).  

Ahh, what can you do?  We may as well call it the Popular Music Hall of Fame, the better to honor pop's diversity (*cough cough*, differences minus standards, *cough cough*)  In the meantime, let me assess each inductee:  

Tina Turner (above).  I just have one question: Why wasn't she inducted years ago?  Good grief, albums such as Private Dancer and Break Every Rule made the eighties less painful than they could have been, and "What's Love Got To Do With It?" may be (simply) the best number-one song of the past forty years.  Better late than never, and I'm happy that I don't have to refer to the late Tina Turner, if you know what I mean. 

Carole King.  Some people will suggest that Carole King doesn't belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame because you can't move to her music.  Okay, "So Far Away" doesn't rock.  But those who say she's not rock enough for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame have obviously never heard "Smackwater Jack" or "Jazzman." And some performers others may consider more rock than Carole King became famous by recording her songs.  

The Go-Go's.  They're the female Beatles.  How could they not be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?  They proved that an all-female band could rock with a pop sensibility like the Beatles did, and "Our Lips Are Sealed" and "We Got the Beat" were as important to rock and roll in 1981 as "I Want To Hold Your Hand" and "She Loves You" were in 1964.  Too bad they didn't last as long; they broke up in 1985, and although they reunited later - frontwoman Belinda Carlisle had a respectable solo career in between - their early disbandment paved the way for Madonna to slam shut the very doors the Go-Go's opened for women who could play instruments and write clever songs. (Madge can do neither.)   

Jay-Z.  No.  Never!  I don't care if Barack Obama did induct him virtually!  He's a rapper, and I remain opposed to rappers crashing the rock and roll party.  Get used to further abominations like this one.  The one thing worse than another rapper being inducted would be Donald Trump inducting a guitar-rock band, but then we don't have to worry about 3 Doors Down getting in.

Foo Fighters.  Post-grunge lives!  The band Dave Grohl formed in the wake of Kurt Cobain's death and Nirvana's subsequent breakup kept the spirit of grunge alive in a more accessible form, an though some may say some of the spirit of grunge was watered down . . . well, Foo Fighters are still great, and they rock better than Maroon 5 ever could.  It's times like these you appreciate Foo Fighters. 

Todd Rundgren.  Rundgren didn't care if he never got inducted, but he still deserves it, if songs like "We Gotta Get You a Woman" (a paean to brotherly friendship), "I Saw the Light," and "Hello, It's Me" are any indication.  I'm so happy with this induction, I just want to bang on the drum all day.  

Artists given Early Influence Awards are bluesman Charley Patton and jazz poet Gil Scott-Heron, which make sense, and the German art rock band Kraftwerk, which seems to make less sense . . . mainly because they're German and they're art rockers.  The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has typically had no love for German music or art rock, mainly because of their overbearing whiteness, so maybe this is a way for the Hall to deflect criticism that the Scorpions and Emerson, Lake and Palmer aren't in.

The Musical Excellence Award went to three individuals, and Billy Preston was one of them.  He deserves this honor, posthumous though it may be, but honestly, why not induct him as a full-fledged Rock and Roll Hall of Fame honoree?  He had two chart-topping hits in the seventies, for Pete's sake!  But an award for "musical excellence" for LL Cool J?  I think I've already said my peace on rap for this year.  As for the late Randy Rhoads, Ozzy Osbourne's guitarist . . .well, I'm sure he was gifted, but a lot of those seventies and eighties metal records just didn't make sense to me. 

Kudos to the Hall for giving the Ahmet Ertegun Award for impresarios to Clarence Avant, the founder of Sussex Records - which put out Bill Withers' records - and the manger of Sarah Vaughan and Dylan producer Tom Wilson, the first black producer at Columbia Records.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was originally established to honor rock and roll performers but has since gone on to include performers representing (*cough cough*) a variety of (*cough cough*) pop styles.

'21 Is Going To Be a Good Year?

Okay, boys and girls, here are the nominees for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Class of 2021!

 

Some of the names on this list, such as Foo Fighters, Chaka Khan, Carole King, the New York Dolls, Rage Against the Machine, Todd Rundgren, Tina Turner and the Go-Go's (the female Beatles) make sense.  Others, like Devo and Iron Maiden, are more questionable.  And there are names like Jay-Z and Dionne Warwick, which scream, "We'll nominate anyone to avoid inducting Jethro Tull."

Jay-Z is an obviously cringe-worthy nod to political correctness, because pop critics have waxed rhapsodic about what a Great and Significant Artist he is; that's as may be, he's still a hip-hop performer, and hip-hop isn't rock.  It isn't even music. (Any comments left here offering an excoriating dissent will be deleted.)  Dionne Warwick?  Hey, I love the woman.  She's one of my people.  (By that, I mean that she's from Essex County, New Jersey.)  But she's a crooner.  And you could bet that when Aretha Franklin did a Bacharach-David song Dionne Warwick had already done, Aretha did it better.  I could go on.  But I won't.  I believe I've made my point.     

Some of the nominees for this year have expressed indifference to the whole damn thing.  Todd Rundgren doesn't care if he's inducted or not, saying that his fans matter more to him than a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction.  Which makes sense when you consider that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has actually honored Madonna but will not even nominate Joe Cocker.  And why hasn't the Hall still nominated Warren Zevon, for Pete's sake?

My Rock and Roll Hall of Fame T-shirt is getting faded and frayed.  Maybe I should dump it, and maybe it's a sign I should stop caring about the Hall itself, as well.  They're not going to nominate any artistes whom I feel should be nominated anytime soon, like Jethro Tull, and even though there are artistes nominated this year whose nominations I agree with, I suppose the folks who run the Hall really won't mind if I sit this one out. 

Listen To the Music

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony for 2020 may be remembered more for being virtual due to the pandemic than for its inductees - if it indeed is remembered at all.  Dude, the it took place the same day Joe Biden was declared the winner of the presidential election - no one even noticed the damn ceremony!  As for 2021, the nominations won't be made until some time early in the new year - under normal circumstances, they would have been made by now already - with an induction ceremony likely in November.  Hopefully, it will be a live and in-person ceremony and not a virtual one, because the pandemic should be over by then.  But the new schedule that pushes the inductions from the spring to the fall could persist in 2022 and beyond.  

But who cares?  No one cared about the inductions this year.

This is a shame, because there were a couple of worthy inductions for 2020, although there were a couple of others that make people wonder why the Hall's leadership just doesn't drop all the pretenses of honoring rock and roll and call it the Popular Music Hall of Fame, Paul McCartney suggested back in 2000.  (Oops, I just said "back in 2000" - that makes me feel so old! 😃)  So here they are, one by one.

Depeche Mode.  Once upon a time I would have said no to inducting these guys because "People Are People" got along so awfully with my ears.  But I've since grown to like Depeche Mode because I've heard a couple of their other songs, and they're easily one of the cooler New Wave bands of the eighties, a decade not known for producing many cool bands in the first place.  And Johnny Cash made the case for them in spades by covering their song "Personal Jesus."  Reach out and touch faith, indeed.

The Doobie Brothers.  The ultimate no-brainer.  Nothing says good times and good vibes like seventies classic rock, and nothing says "seventies classic rock" like the Doobie Brothers, who turned over more than a few members over a decade's time yet still made great music.  Early hits such as "Listen To the Music," "Long Train Running," and "China Grove" from the era when Tom Johnston  fronted the band were toe-tapping rockers, and the Dixieland-based "Black Water" showed a strong command of roots music in a pop context, but but when Michael McDonald joined, the Doobies then gravitated to a soul-based jazz-inspired sound that expanded the Doobies' command of pop - and bringing in Jeff "Skunk" Baxter from Steely Dan was also a plus.  The Doobie Brothers were one of the very few classic rock bands to re-invigorated by a key personnel change - however, give kudos to the group's constant, guitarist-singer Patrick Simmons, as well as bassist Tiran Porter - and they deserve to be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame strictly for McDonald, the greatest white singer of the seventies.

Whitney Houston. I'm sorry.  Whitney Houston doesn't belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  Don't get me wrong.  She was a great singer.  She had numerous hits, most of which were enjoyable when they came on the radio.  You can't take that away from her. And as she came from Essex County, New Jersey - my home ground - I obviously have pride in her achievements.  But she was not a rock and roll singer and, despite her gospel roots, never rose to the level of Aretha Franklin or Etta James.  She was pop.

Nine Inch Nails.  Nine Inch Nails, until British musician Atticus Ross joined in 2016, was multi-instrumentalist Trent Reznor and whoever he chose to being into the studio or on stage.  But this one-man band created some really intense music back in the nineties, and like Depeche Mode, was given the seal of approval by a Johnny Cash cover (Cash remade the Nine Inch Nails song "Hurt").  So, yes, this induction makes sense.  

The Notorious B.I.G.  No.  He was a rapper.  The end.  

T. Rex.  For their energy, and their crunchy hooks, T. Rex are more than deserving to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  The late Marc Bolan was a great frontman, backing up his power pop with rock and roll attitude.  "Bag a Gong (Get It On)" and "Jeepster" only scratch the surface of T. Rex's incredible music, but they're enough on their own to justify their induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.    

The 2020 Ahmet Ertegun Award for the contributions of producers, label bosses, mangers, and other impresarios went to former MCA Irving Azoff, who also managed the Eagles, and rock critic Jon Landau, who quit the Fourth Estate to manage Bruce Springsteen. While some old-school rock critics may still hold a grudge against Azoff for giving us the Eagles, he's long been a professional in managing and running the business side of things in pop and rock, and Landau . . . well, he's the reason we all know who Springsteen is.  He's more than deserving of this honor.

And that's it for my comments on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Class of 2020.  For those whose favorite acts didn't even get nominated (*cough cough*, Jethro Tull, *cough cough*), hope springs eternal for 2021.  (Yeah, right.)

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was originally established to honor rock and roll performers but has since gone on to include performers representing a variety of pop styles.  But who cares?

No Record Reviews For 2020

The COVID-19 pandemic pretty much made it impossible for me to compile a list of winners and losers for this year because, as I explained back in October, everyone's a loser in a pandemic.  (That includes Joe Biden, who won the Presidency but who now bears the unenviable task of getting us out of the pandemic at a time of political polarization.)  Now the pandemic has led me to cancel something else for 2020 - my reviews of classic record albums, which I'm sure you all love and look forward to.  I just haven't found the time this year to listen to any classic albums often enough to find the time to formulate opinions of them that I can express in in clear, coherent sentences, because of this damn virus.   

Back in 2019, I had a rough time for personal reasons, which distracted me from writing about classic records for most of the year, but I managed to conjure up some reviews for December 2019.  This December, I won't even attempt to do that because so much is going on with all of us.  Hopefully I'll be able to get back to writing about classic record albums in 2021, and I may even write about records from current bands.  Review Greta Van Fleet? That would be nice!  But not now.  Now is definitely not the time. 

Although, I will be commenting on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees for 2020, in full.  The induction ceremony took place the day the presidential election was called for Biden, so no one noticed it.  (To respond to the inevitable insistence that no one cares about rock and roll anymore - so why even talk about Greta Van Fleet? - the Hall of Fame's Class of 2020 does include a rapper and a pop diva.)  So stay tuned for that.

Notorious

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees for 2020 have been named, and sure enough, there are at least two dubious choices - but as the two artists who exude such dubiousness are black, anyone who has a problem with their inductions either have to hold their tongues or speak out while risking charges of bigotry against them.

The nominees in question are rapper Christopher Wallace, alternatively known as the Notorious B.I.G. or as Biggie Smalls, and pop singer Whitney Houston.  Even though neither of these performers ever encouraged anyone to pick up a guitar or crank the amps up to eleven, apologists for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame are already making the arguments in favor of these inductions.  The argument for Wallace is the same for every rapper - rap embraces the same outlaw spirit that once influenced rock and roll but no longer does - and the argument for Houston is that she inspired so many black women in popular music who came after her and besides, it's time to give due to women of color who began their recording careers after 1970 or so.

I'm sorry, I have to disagree. Rap, or hip-hop, or whatever the hell it's called these days, has its own Hall of Fame, and Wallace doesn't belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame any more than Jimi Hendrix belongs in the one for rap.  Whitney Houston may have inspired many black women and even some white women to become singers, but few of them can be plausibly called "rock" singers.  If you want to add more black women to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame roster, there are women like Tina Turner (who, shockingly, has never been inducted as a solo act) or Nona Hendryx, who made a solo album after Labelle broke up that was full of heavy playing that could have fit nicely onto an AOR playlist.  Or Chaka Khan, who rocked with Rufus and sang "I'm Every Woman" before Houston did.  These two nominations were made strictly to check boxes out of political correctness to promote "diversity." 

Look, I have no problem with Whitney Houston as a singer.  I even featured her on my beautiful-women picture blog.  I thought she was a fine performer.  I thought she was good at what she did.  But what she did was sing MOR ballads and light disco tunes.  And the truth is, her music inspired as many critics as fans - even among those who acknowledged her talent.  Joan Baez once said in a Rolling Stone interview that Houston had "the most incredible gymnastic setup in her voice" but lamented that ninety percent of her material was "just plain boring," because she flaunted her voice without having much to say.  And, of course, I do have a problem with Wallace, big-time, and I won't say anymore about that than I already have. 

As you may have already noticed, Wallace and Houston have one other thing in common - they're both deceased, and they both died under tragic circumstances.  They've since been martyred.  So fans of hip-hop or dance pop are going to have a problem with anyone who has a problem with these inductions.  Criticizing these inductions won't make those of us who object just look bigoted - it's going to make us look churlish.  That's the chance we have to take.  Because last time I checked, it's called the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and not the Popular Music Hall of Fame, and rock fans shouldn't let liberal guilt get in the way of setting parameters that allows just anyone to be inducted.  That means acknowledging that some white men shouldn't have been inducted, like James Taylor, who is a major talent but is not rock.  The inductions of some white male pop-rockers who lean more toward pop than rock, like Billy Joel, may have to be reassessed.   But for Pete's sake, let's make it clear that there have to be parameters before Kanye West ("Rap is the new rock and roll") becomes eligible for induction in 2029 - or before Ed Sheeran gets inducted in 2039!

And I think I've made myself clear about those losers Maroon 5.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony - which will also see the induction of the Doobie Brothers and T. Rex, two acts whose inductions are long overdue - takes place on May 2.  I'll have more to say on this subject at that time.

Mad Dogs and Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Nominees

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 2020 nominees have been announced, and, sure enough, Jethro Tull have not been nominated.  This was to be expected, because the pop critics who run the place hate Ian Anderson, and Anderson doesn't think much of them either.  Also, he has that Best Heavy Metal Record Grammy from 1988 to live down.  

But come on - no nomination for the late Joe Cocker? Still??

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's new director, John Sykes, is a veteran of the music business who helped get MTV up and running, and he is looking to include more "diversity" - that is, including more women and people of color in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame nominations, even if their music doesn't fit the basic definition of rock and roll, which may explain why Whitney Houston is a nominee this year.  Don't get me wrong, I had nothing against Whitney Houston - she was one of my people, that is, she grew up in Essex County, New Jersey, like I did, and where I still live - but her music was not rock and roll. Her energetic songs were pure pop, and her ballads were throwbacks to 1970s MOR.  But just because Sykes is aiming for more diversity doesn't mean he's shutting out white guys entirely.  The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 2020 nominees include classic rockers such as the Doobie Brothers, Todd Rundgren, T. Rex, and Judas Priest, and the Dave Matthews Band and Depeche Mode are among the more modern rockers on the list.   Diversity is represented by classic rockers Thin Lizzy, whose frontman, Phil Lynott, was half black and half white, and Rufus, which was fronted by Chaka Khan.  They indeed belong in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  But not The Notorious B.I.G, because rap isn't rock (and isn't even music), and, even though she's a woman, Pat Benatar doesn't belong in it either. She was and remains a hack,; her classic rock records were the sort of corporate rock that is the sonic equivalent of diet soda.

Most of the nominees this year make sense (a full list is available here), but the continued snubbing of the late Joe Cocker (below) is an unacceptable outrage. He's been eligible for induction for longer than it takes to become eligible. Conventional wisdom suggests that Cocker is routinely shut out because a) he ripped off black singers like Ray Charles (although Charles loved his singing) and b) he mostly recorded cover versions of songs, particularly R&B songs, so why settle for copies when you can have the originals?  By that criterion, Linda Ronstadt should never have been nominated for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but she's in it.  Anyway, those are stupid reasons not to include one of the greatest blue-eyed soul singers - maybe the greatest blue-eyed soul singer - ever.  The Hall can go ahead and snub Jethro Tull, but if the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame can't acknowledge Joe Cocker's greatness, then to hell with the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. 

Family being nominated?  Yeah, that's never going to happen.

Edge of '19

I may be a little late in commenting on the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees for 2019, but better late than never.  This may be the last time you hear from me about anything for awhile, because my area of the country is under a severe-weather threat (although nothing as severe as yesterday's weather in Texas is expected), so that usually means a power and/or cable outage, and I've been getting too many of those lately.

Right.  The class of 2019 was as musically diverse as always, I guess, but there's only one black artist among them - a woman, and it's no one like Sister Rosetta Tharpe, or Labelle's Nona Hendryx - who made some records that sound more like prog and heavy rock than the sort of dance music associated with performers of her race and her sex.  It's someone who does make the sort of dance music associated with performers of her race and her sex.  Proving once again that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame doesn't seem to know what "rock" really is, and being politically correct is more important than musically focused.  Oh well, here are my takes on each inductee:

The Cure.  Robert Smith is God.  So I've been led to understand.  The Cure are edgy, to be sure, and the fact that they've never been hitmakers in the Top 40 sense and the fact also that they rarely get any radio play show that they have that rock and roll attitude.  So, yeah, this is a no-brainer.

Def Leppard.  This is the most indefensible induction this year.  Def Leppard were a hack metal band that came up with songs misogynistic enough to embarrass Brian Johnson, played with more flash than with substance (think of them as a heavy-metal Duran Duran), and clownishly aped their name from Led Zeppelin (not to mention the medieval obsession), and Joe Elliott's imitation of Robert Plant was hardly a sincere form of flattery.  If  any band was indicative of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's penchant for awarding mediocrity over artistic integrity.

Janet Jackson.  You know what I'm gonna say about her, don't ya?  Okay, I'm not saying Janet Jackson isn't a good singer or anything, and I agree that she's a first-rate entertainer, but so is Barbra Streisand, and no one is urging that the Rock and Roll of Fame induct her.  Janet Jackson's music has a good beat and you can dance to it, but it still isn't rock.  Good grief, her brother Michael made more records worthy of being called rock, and he did it so effortlessly.  Now, I know that some Janet Jackson fans consider her the Queen, and they're not going to like anything I've said against her Rock Hall induction, but guess what? I don't care.  The fact that she's sampled America riffs doesn't impress me - in fact, it shows how clueless she is - I mean, she thinks America is rock?  And they shouldn't be in the Hall of Fame either (and aren't, last time I checked).

Stevie Nicks.  Another no-brainer.  Stevie Nicks proved herself as a solo rock artist with her monumental 1981 album Bella Donna, which featured the classic "Edge of Seventeen" and also cast male LA rockers Tom Petty and Don Henley in subservient roles in their duets with her.  She's the best white female American singer of her time, and she is in complete control of her career.  Like Janet Jackson, but more of a rocker. 

Radiohead.  No contest.  They belong in the Rock Hall for bringing back prog from the dead after so many awful art rock bands killed it with their pretentiousness.  Radiohead are the smartest and most innovative prog band since Pink Floyd,  and they honor the prog genre as much as Floyd did.

Roxy Music.  They definitely deserve to be in.  Roxy Music were art rock in much different way than Pink Floyd or Yes, adding a dash of chic production and cool sophistication to their smart playing, and Bryan Ferry is one of the most compelling vocalists in all of rock.  Never heard Roxy Music?  Imagine New Romantic flair with some jazz-rock sensibilities and a little bit of  soul, and you get the idea. 

The Zombies.  The only question as to why the Zombies were inducted in 2019 is why they weren't inducted sooner.  "She's Not There" and "Tell Her No" are still infectious and enjoyable examples of sixties British Invasion rock, and they definitely had a sound all their own.

So, okay, not a bad class of inductees, but not a great one either.  I'm not going to complain about the usual snubs that persist annually, because all of my complaints are useless . . . except to say that, now that I have satellite radio, I couldn't help but notice how the broadcasts from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland almost never seem to include certain acts that get routinely snubbed by not even being nominated.  I think the Hall's directors have made themselves clear about those acts. 

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was originally established to honor rock and roll performers but has since gone on to include performers representing a variety of pop styles.  Whatever.

Pour Some Sugar On It

But, for some of you, a spoonful of sugar won't help this news go down.  

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame announced its inductees for 2019, and while there is some good news to celebrate - the Cure, Radiohead, Roxy Music and the Zombies are getting in, as well as Stevie Nicks as a solo artist - there's bad news for anyone rooting for worthy nominees like John Prine, Todd Rundgren, and Rage Against The Machine, as well as the Detroit pre-punk/metal band the MC5; they didn't make the cut.  And Jethro Tull, who have been eligible for induction for about as long as it takes to become eligible (twenty-five years), have never even been nominated.

And then there are nominees that I have more than a problem with . . . Janet Jackson and Def Leppard.  

Janet Jackson's induction isn't nearly as disastrous as the induction of Madonna in 2008 the second she was eligible, but she has the same disqualifying characteristic that Madge has - she's pure pop.  And a lot of rock fans agree that Janet Jackson shouldn't be inducted for that reason.  But, sure enough, fans of Janet Jackson insist that such opposition is racially motivated - her detractors have a problem with a black woman being inducted over a white man like Todd Rundgren.  Uh, no, it's about aesthetics.  Janet isn't rock.  Disagree with me on that if you will, but I say she isn't.  Yeah, I know she borrowed riffs from the soft-rock group America for some of her songs, but last time I checked, America aren't in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and as my reaction to their first greatest-hits compilation makes clear, I don't think they should be in either.

And lest you still think I'm biased toward white-boy guitar music where the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is concerned - objections to Madonna's induction were met with charges of sexism by her fans, and some of those fans played the race, ethnicity and sexual orientation cards in deference to Madge's black, Hispanic and gay audiences - I point to the metal band Def Leppard, whose induction I find far more objectionable than Janet Jackson's.  They're a loud, obnoxious bunch of clowns who came up with such godawful songs like "Pour Some Sugar On Me" and came up with a lot of cheesy videos for their singles.  They're one of the many reasons I don't look back at the eighties with fondness, and on principle, I object to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inducting anyone who reminds me that the 1980s were far worse than I remember.      

You still think I'm biased toward white guys?  Well, what if I told you that Chaka Khan's old group Rufus was nominated again this year but was still turned down, and to my great disappointment?  There, I thought that would quiet you down.   

And I probably shouldn't expect Jethro Tull to ever be nominated, because I suspect that the Hall's board members literally hate them.  Okay, maybe they just disrespect Martin Barre, but they clearly loathe Ian Anderson.  British folk-rock bands with cult followings, such as Fairport Convention and Steeleye Span, can't expect to get nominated either, and we should just plain forget about Family, Lindisfarne, Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel and any other British acts that never did big business in the U.S. getting nominated.

And wait until you here this - it turns out that Joe Cocker, who died in 2014, hasn't been inducted either!  What the hell is going on here?  That's an even greater outrage than all of those British folk-rock groups not getting in. Cocker sold lots of records in the States; he was at Woodstock, for Pete's sake!

Look on the bright side, folks - there are no rap acts nominated this year.  Expect more commentary on this topic in time for or shortly after the actual Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony this coming March 29.

Oh yeah, the Grammy nominations . . . Would you believe I haven't heard who got nominated for what?  Though, I'd be lying if I said I cared.

Money For Nothing

It's that time of year again, when I comment on the latest class of Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees.  The class was officially inducted in ceremony last week (April 14).   This may the best class in a longtime, for one simple reason - no rappers are included!

And yes, I saw that Kendrick Lamar won a Pulitzer Prize in arts and letters for his artless word salad, a distinction no rock and roller has ever achieved.  I can hear it now from rap fans - "White racists are upset that Kendrick got a prize no white guy with a guitar ever got - HA!"  Go jump in the lake, ya crummy clowns.

So what of this year's inductees?  Well, they're a mixed grill, but they're still more or less deserving of the honor of being enshrined in the great hall in Cleveland.  So let's take each act one by one:

Bon Jovi.  Bon Jovi were one of the most annoying bands in the 1980s.  Their songs were puffed up by lightweight pop-metal arrangements and their lyrics were weighed down by obvious clichés. So why do they belong here?  Their music got better over time. "Who Says You Can't Go Home," from 2005, has a good, fist-pumping vibe, and even some of their older songs sound better with age; the more you listen to "Livin' On a Prayer," the more meaning and heart you derive from it.  Also, Jon Bon Jovi is a nice guy who's donated to worthy charities.  He's not the arrogant jerk we remember from the Reagan years, and I don't think anyone misses that guy.  Also, he has a great sense of humor, Asked once what he thought of having inspired so many pop-metal bands of the late eighties and early nineties, he replied, "I'm sorry."  Not exactly contrition of the sackcloth-and-ashes variety, but I'll take it.  

the Cars.  This one's a slam dunk.  The Cars re-invented power pop with a sleek New Wave style and appealed to fans who'd thought they didn't like power pop or New Wave.  The brilliance of "Good Times Roll" and "Let's Go" cannot be denied, and the achingly beautiful "Drive" was a strong enough song for former Family frontman Roger Chapman to cover. Also, anyone who's seen the Cars' promotional videos can appreciate their ability to poke fun at listeners and themselves - and their video for their single "Tonight She Comes" made much better use of model Tara Shannon (full disclosure - she's a Facebook friend of mine) than Huey Lewis and the News's videos ever could. :-D

Dire Straits.  Oh, come on, how could you not induct this band?  Mark Knopfler is one of the most articulate songwriters in rock and roll,, a subtle guitarist who remained true to rock's traditions while the punks were questioning the old way of doing things.  That talent produced great radio hits like "Sultans of Swing," as well as  clever observations like "Lady Writer," the great ballad "Romeo and Juliet," and the wildly misinterpreted satire "Money For Nothing," a song from their 1985 album Brothers In Arms disguised as a lament of the influence of MTV on rock but actually a lighthearted jab at blue-collar music fans who envy rock musicians.  And Brothers In Arms, with its heartfelt tribute to fifties rock, "Walk Of Life," and its gentle ballad "Why Worry" (a song Art Garfunkel worked into his repertoire), is one of the most humanistic LPs of the 1980s.   

the Moody Blues.  A pompous and pretentious album like 1967's Days of Future Passed should have disqualified these guys for induction, as it inspired several other "concept albums" in which, as Jimmy Guterman and Owen O'Donnell wrote in "The Worst Rock and Roll Records of All Time," "a performer in love with his own ideas erects a wobbly album around a concept that could be summed up in a simple three-minute song."   Days of Future Passed revolved around the theme of a day from dawn to darkness; Family proved Guterman and O'Donnell right just a year after with "Mellowing Grey," the second track on their debut album Music In a Doll's House (the fiftieth anniversary of the release of which is this July).  That song summed up a dawn-to-dusk passage of time in less than three minutes, and with much more tasteful orchestration.  And oh yes, Family aren't being inducted this year either.  So why should the Moody Blues get inducted?  Because they also came up with some good records, like their cover of Bessie Banks' "Go Now" (sung by original member Denny Laine, who later joined Paul McCartney's Wings) as well as songs like "Ride My See-Saw" from their 1968 LP In Search of the Lost Chord and "I'm Just a Singer (In a Rock and Roll Band)" from their 1972 Seventh Sojourn album.  I'm sorry . . . I have to forgive them for Days of Future Passed when I hear "The Voice" from 1981's Long Distance Voyager - that is a great song that qualifies them for Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction alone.

Nina Simone. Her social consciousness as a civil rights activist and her sultry delivery of songs such as "I Put a Spell on You" make her induction a no-brainer.  I have to wonder, though, what Simone, who died in 2003 (it was fifteen years ago today, in fact), would have thought of being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame with the silly white boys mentioned above.  If anything, it would have been great, had she lived, to see her jam with the Moody Blues and hear her croon "Nights In White Satin" with Justin Hayward.

Sister Rosetta Tharpe.  Sister Rosetta got inducted for being an early influence. And why not?  She was one of the few female blues guitarists in the pre-rock era, and she used distortion and heavy riffs in her music, inspiring Carl Perkins, Chuck Berry, Eric Clapton, and Jimi Hendrix.  That enough is reasons to induct Sister Rosetta, the "Godmother of Rock and Roll."

A class comprised entirely of white male performers and black female performers, with the white guys representing pop-metal, power pop, straight rock, and prog and the black gals representing soul, blues and jazz, makes for an interesting spin on the idea of diversity, and this is as interesting as it's going to get.  Because you can bet your sweet candy bar that the inductees for 2019 will lean more toward the pop side of rock and also include at least one rap act for honkies like myself to blow a gasket over.  And a lot of more deserving acts will be snubbed, and I've already mentioned Family.  And I really don't see a reason to mention other snubs again (*cough cough*, Jethro Tull, *cough cough*) when there are so many rappers that the Hall is bending over backwards to honor.  Which means that, when he becomes eligible, Kendrick Lamar will be inducted.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was originally established to honor rock and roll performers but has since gone on to include performers representing a variety of pop styles. DAMN!

Just What I Needed

The Rock and Roll Fall of Fame inductees for 2018 were just announced, and they are a mixed grill at first glance, but they make sense after you look closer.  The inductees are Bon Jovi, the Cars, Dire Straits, the Moody Blues, Nina Simone and Sister Rosetta Tharpe.

So you have three bona fide classic rock bands, a band that debuted in the MTV era, and two female influences on rock and roll - Nina Simone for her sultry soul and Sister Rosetta for her folk-gospel guitar playing.  And, in case you haven't noticed, the inductees are all either white men or black women - a perfect summation about how the sisters influenced those of us who aren't exactly brothers.

Which is why I wasn't very happy when I heard about complaints about Nina Simone being included because she wasn't rock and roll. Uh, dudes, could I see you in my office?  Nina Simone sang the blues, the music that gave rock and roll its meaning, and she influenced every white male rocker with open minds and open ears - including the Beatles.  "Michelle" would have been a straight and uninteresting ballad if John Lennon hadn't convinced Paul McCartney to emphasize a different syllable in the song's English-language lyrics after hearing Nina Simone do something similar in her recording of "I Put a Spell On You."  Here I am trying to stick up for rock and roll, and you're not doing me any favors by spewing out the sort of racism and misogyny that makes me feel bad for Omarosa Manigault-Newman.

But, in discussing the merits of the inductees, I'm getting ahead of myself.  Suffice it to say that I'm glad the Cars are in, though I'm not sure about the Moody Blues.  But the induction ceremony is in April, so I'll expand on the class of 2018 at that point.

A lot of folks are bound to be ticked off by who wasn't chosen; nominees got voted down include Rage Against the Machine, the Eurythmics, Radiohead, Judas Priest, Kate Bush, Depeche Mode, the J. Geils Band, the MC5, The Meters, Rufus, Link Wray and the Zombies.   There's bound to be rage against Rage Against the Machine's failure to get in, people are probably yelling "Judas Priest!" over the snub against Judas Priest ( the band took its name from Bob Dylan's song "The Ballad of Frankie Lee and Judas Priest," although it's also a wholesome curse used in old Hollywood movies in place of "Jesus Christ").  But of course, I have to, as always, note who wasn't even nominated - Jethro Tull, the seventies British band critics love to hate, and Family, the greatest band you've never heard.  Especially Family.  Rock acts have to have released their debut records no sooner than twenty-five years before to qualify for induction, and Family released their first record fifty years ago this past September - "Scene Through the Eye of a Lens."   I will also note that July 2018 marks the fiftieth anniversary of their debut LP, Music In a Doll's House, the greatest debut album of 1968 that isn't the Band's Music From Big Pink.  Twenty eighteen would have been the perfect time to correct this long-overdue snub of the greatest band to come out of Leicestershire, but since American record buyers couldn't be bothered with Family back in 1968, the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame can't be bothered with them today either.

But here's a modicum of hope for fans of any non-American rock act who didn't have the good fortune to achieve commercial success in the U.S.  Billboard magazine reports that the 2018 class was voted on by over nine hundred artists, historians and record-business members who "weighed factors including musical influence on other artists, and length and depth of career and body of work," as well as "innovation and superiority in style and technique."  Look, Family influenced other artists - Freddie Mercury, I understand, was a fan, as is Cheap Trick's Rick Nielsen.  Length and depth of body of work?  Seven albums in five years.  Good enough for me.  Innovation?  Superior style?  Listen to A Song For Me and Fearless and you'll see that Family had both in their favor.  And the fact that not just Americans but people from other countries are now voting in these Rock Hall induction elections means that British acts we Yanks aren't that familiar with should be able to get a shot.  The Soft Machine?  Kevin Ayers?  Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel?  Lindisfarne?  Pulp?  Why not?

But Tull?  If they can't get in now despite their huge American fan base, they never will.  But Family might one day get in . . . in their own time.     

Turn To Stone

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony for the class of 2017 was held a few days ago, and as always, I have something to say about it. Lots to say in fact.  Rock and roll seems to have reached a critical condition where it struggles for relevance in this century even as the Hall struggles to be taken seriously.   Right now, both seem to be losing their respective battles.  I mean, the keepers of the Hall inducted a corporate rock band that was a leading cause of rock's decline in favor of rap, and at the same time, they induct another rapper!  Go figure.

So what do I think of the new class of inductees overall?  Well, I'm glad you asked, because I was going to tell you anyway.  So here it goes:

the Electric Light Orchestra.  Jeff Lynne's classical pop-rock band did for strings what Chicago did for brass instruments - that is, they turned their sound into such a cliché that it got really tiresome really fast.  But I'm glad ELO got inducted.  Why?  Because a lot of their seventies hits were very good in spite of their overuse of strings.  Notable examples include "Do Ya," a remake of Lynne's old song from his time with the Move, as well as "Strange Magic" and "Showdown," and I always loved the humor of "Don't Bring Me Down" - including the fact that Lynne occasionally sings the song's misheard bridge lyric, "Don't bring me down, Bruce!" instead of the correct lyric, "Don't being me down, Gruß" ( a German-language term of endearment), in live performances.  But there's another reason Lynne deserves to be honored.  As a member of George Harrison's Traveling Wilburys, he injected life into his fellow Wilburys' recordings.  He co-produced Roy Orbison's last album and Tom Petty's Full Moon Fever LP, and he helped the three surviving Beatles turn two demos of unreleased John Lennon songs into actual Beatles songs, the last two new Beatles songs ever released, for the group's Anthology series.  Heck, Lynne should be in the Hall for that last achievement alone.

Joan Baez.  Joan Baez should definitely be the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, even though she herself doesn't consider herself a rock and roller.  Because she did record songs from her buddy Bob Dylan with great care and feeling, she inspired Dylan on more than one occasion, and she helped infuse rock with political awareness.  Just forget her awful cover of the Band's "The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down."  Never mind that.

Journey.  Journey's induction is proof that the inmates are running the asylum - or, at least, the fans are running the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (fans can vote now).  What was so bad about Journey?  Well, for one thing, Steve Perry (who showed up at the induction ceremonies but did not perform with the group) has a voice with all the charm of a methane fire, the group's founders - guitarist Neal Schon and keyboardist Gregg Rolie - never showed the same spark they had when they were in Carlos Santana's band and Carlos was calling the shots, and Journey's music was always coldly programmed to fit into an AOR radio format - a radio format that has fallen on hard times since Journey's eighties glory days.  Stop believing, already.  As I said back in December, the banality of Journey and other corporate rock bands of their ilk made rock so boring and predictable that kids turned to rap for excitement, relegating rock and roll to a long and steady decline.  Quite an achievement, eh? And certainly a big reason for why we have to suffer the insufferable induction of . . .

Tupac Shakur.  No, no, no.  Rap is not rock, and it's not even music.  Next!

Yes.  Just say no.  Despite a few clever progressive rock tracks like "Roundabout" and "Long Distance Runaround," most of Yes's music was meaningless twaddle, and Tales From Topographic Oceans wasn't even good enough to be twaddle.   Their reputation is based on a few choice cuts from their early-seventies albums Fragile and Close To the Edge and their 1983 hit single "Owner of a Lonely Heart,"  but if classic rock radio were forced to dig deeper into their catalog and play more of their work, Yes would have never even made it on the ballot.  And when was the last time you heard any edits from Tales From Topographic Oceans on the radio?  Good grief, even Jethro Tull's Thick as a Brick is held in higher esteem, and that was supposed to be a joke!         

Pearl Jam.  Absolutely, unequivocally and definitely a must for induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Their music, part of the Seattle grunge scene of the early nineties, gave voice to a generation - mine - of frustrated slackers done in by Reaganomics before we even got into the workforce, and frontman Eddie Vedder is still singing and speaking for us all these years later.  Rock on! 

And the recipient of the Award for Musical Excellence . . .  

Nile Rodgers.  I begrudgingly acknowledge Rodgers' honor, which would be easier to do if he hadn't worked with Madonna and Duran Duran.  But he did produce David Bowie and was likely an inspiration for Prince, so sure, why not?  And some of those Chic records he was a part of were okay.  Just don't get me to try to dance to any of them at a party.  No air guitar in them. ;-)

As always, I have my complaints.  The aforementioned Jethro Tull are still shut out again, while Family - more progressive on one album than Yes were over the course of ten albums - apparently remains ineligible for simply never having broken through commercially in America.  (Thanks for nothing, Bill Graham.)  And while hope springs eternal for 2018, I'm not holding my breath.  And if the Hall wants to honor another corporate rock act, at least induct Foreigner - Lou Gramm is a great singer, and they belong in there for "Long, Long Way From Home" alone!

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was originally established to honor rock and roll performers but has since gone on to include performers representing a variety of pop styles.  Or so I've been told.