Monday, December 28, 2009

Eighties Redux

The decade that's about to close, the two thousand zeroes (actually, the 201st decade of Our Lord began on January 1, 2001, owing to lack of a year zero, and ends December 31, 2010, but let that pass), bore a strange and unbearable resemblance to the 1980s. Which is understandable, considering the lack of character the past decade had - we weren't even sure what to call it. I've always said that I would never want to relive the eighties again, but I think I just did. Consider the evidence of the past ten years:
The stock market kept going up before it finally crashed on a Monday.
The biggest foreign policy concern was terrorism.
Foreigners were fighting in Afghanistan, except this time we were among the foreigners.
The President of the United States was a dim-bulb conservative and a guy named Bush.
His domestic policy was comprised of tax cuts for the wealthy and a great emphasis on religion in the public square.
An even dimmer bulb was nominated by the Republicans at the end of the decade for the Vice Presidency.
Britney Spears was the new Madonna, and the original Madonna issued five albums and went on four tours.
The original lineup of Duran Duran reunited.
The most popular sitcom on television starred Jon Cryer and noted psychopathic spouse Charlie Sheen.
There was a plethora of blockbuster action movies, some of which had comic book superheroes.
Sylvester Stallone made a sixth Rocky movie and a fourth Rambo movie, and in California, Arnold Schwarzenegger was elected Governator.
Bob Geldof produced global concerts to bring awareness of hunger in Africa.
Yuppie taste dictated trends in everything from cars to coffee.
The biggest domestic concern was the federal budget deficit.
You couldn't go anywhere in New York without seeing break dancing.
One of the Beatles died early in the decade.
Happy new year. We can't end this decade fast enough. :-O

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