Well, it's that time of year again, the end of the year, ain't been 'round since you know when, yes, it's my annual list of winners and losers of the year!
For 2008, I'm going to try to keep myself honest and find as many selections in as many different fields as possible so it doesn't end up as a list of all the winners and losers in politics, because that's too easy. However, I will add a few extra political names here and there, when the situation calls for it. So, without further ado, here are my winners for 2008:
Barack Obama. This one was easy. Having come from behind in a tough presidential primary season against Hillary Clinton, where no one gave him a chance, and having handled the economic crisis of the autumn campaign against Republican John McCain deftly, he stuck to a consistent message of change and hope . . . and in doing so was elected the first black President of the United States. Now, of course, comes the hard part . . . governing.
Democracy in America. More people voted. More people participated in the campaign. More people cared.
Robert Downey, Jr. Don't say there are no great comebacks in Hollywood anymore; once left for permanent hasbeen status for his drug addictions, Downey overcame his demons and starred in one of the biggest hits of the summer movie season, Iron Man. He even stirred up talk of an Oscar nomination with his portrayal of a white Australian actor playing a black American character in the comedy Tropic Thunder.
Anne Hathaway. The young actress from New Jersey had a rough personal life - messy divorce and all that - but on screen, she demonstrated her talent for playing it sweet in the movie version of the 1960s TV series "Get Smart" and playing it sour with her role in Jonathan Demme's Rachel Getting Married.
Tina Fey. The former "Saturday Night Live" cast member and writer picked up a load of Emmys for her work on the NBC sitcom "30 Rock," one of the few bright spots for that network of late. (Anyone see "Kath and Kim," starring "Saturday Night Live" alumna Molly Shannon? Anyone?) Then Fey returned to the show that made her famous - helping to boost its ratings to levels not seen in a decade - and played Sarah Palin without the need for heavy makeup. The governor of Alaska may be able to see Russia from her house, but Fey can see forever when she looks ahead at her career.
Heavy metal. Axl Rose finally delivered the long-awaited Guns 'n' Roses album Chinese Democracy to favorable reviews, and AC/DC released the LP Black Ice to even more favorable sales . . . in an exclusive marketing deal with Wal-Mart that, on the heels of that firm's exclusive selling of last year's Eagles release, portends more such deals with several chain stores in the future.
New York rock radio. The Big Apple is still a disco town, but the addition of another rock radio station to the New York metropolitan airwaves makes it easier for Tristate rock fans who still listen to the radio the old-fashioned way, without satellites or Internet connections. When WRXP-FM went on the air in February, it joined classic rock station WAXQ-FM and modern rock station WXRK-FM, and so New York has three stations devoted to rock and roll. And that's not even counting more stations in the Long Island and New Jersey suburbs. :-)
The Philadelphia Phillies. In one of the weirdest and wackiest baseball championships in history, the Phils beat back a strong challenge from the Tampa Bay Rays to win their first World Series in 28 years.
Michael Phelps. What can I say about the new grand homme of swimming that hasn't been said? Fourteen career gold medals, eight of them at the Beijing Olympics alone, and he's not ready to hang up his goggles yet.
Volkswagen. At a time when other automakers - even Toyota - are struggling through the global financial crisis, Volkswagen seems to be bucking the trend. The German automaker plans to open its first American factory in 2011 in Tennessee - 23 years after its Pennsylvania plant, the first factory opened in the U.S. by a non-American automaker, closed - and its stock has surged on the Frankfurt exchange.
Rachel Maddow. Rachel getting ratings! The Air America radio host proved that progressive politics can succeed on cable television - MSNBC, 9:00 Eastern - and she delivers satirical zingers with more subtlety than Keith Olbermann can manage.
Denver. It hosted the Democratic National Convention without incident, and the planning and security were so good, Barack Obama's acceptance speech at Mile High Stadium went flawlessly.
And now, as Cheap Trick once asked, "Whatever happened to all this season's losers of the year?" They're right here:
Wall Street. If John McCain considered wild Dow Jones point swings and losses a sign of an active economy - because of all that selling - no wonder he thought the fundamentals of our economy were strong.
Detroit. Motown just keeps falling with no floor in sight. Its automobile industry has to rely on loans from the government, its crime rate is rising along with its unemployment rate, and its mayor was forced out of office in a scandal involving sex, lies and audiotape. At least the Lions, its NFL team, have a perfect record for the 2008-09 football season - sixteen games lost and no games won. With all due respect to Martha Reeves - now a Detroit councilwoman - we can forget the Motor City.
The Republican Party. The Guardians of Privilege (GOP) got a major beating in the November presidential and congressional elections, thanks to an unpopular war and an unpopular Republican president. But John McCain, because of his gravitas, might have won enough independent voters to defeat Obama. Instead, he went chasing for supporters among the white evangelical base and demonstrated a misunderstanding of the financial crisis when it broke in September. McCain actually won by losing, though; the economy isn't going to be his problem.
The New England Patriots. They had a perfectly good record from last season - the opposite of the hapless Detroit Lions - and they lost Super Bowl XLII in an upset to the Giants. Coming as it did after their season, it was even more embarrassing than the losses of the cowardly Lions.
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. The once-respectable institution had compromised itself with the inductions of numerous pop acts with a dubious connection to rock and roll, but it squandered whatever credibility it had left when its board inducted Madonna in her first year of eligibility after having denied worthier acts that had been eligible for years. The Hall has preferred to downplay the rock and roll aspect and play up the fame aspect. The museum itself, in Cleveland, is no longer an essential tourist attraction to visit thanks to an annex that opened in New York - which, as noted, is still a disco town these days. (Indeed, the New York annex celebrates rock venues in the Apple that no longer exist.)
Kevin Costner. The nineties are over, but someone forgot to tell him. His movie Swing Vote, an alleged comedy about an undecided voter whose choice will determine the outcome of a presidential election by itself, was voted out of theaters by moviegoers who were more entertained by the real thing on cable TV news. Costner undistinguished himself further with a country record, Untold Truths, which only reached number 75 on the country charts. He can't handle the untold truth!
The Chicago Cubs. The fabled North Side baseball team had one of the best records in the National League, but a loss in a key divisional series game shut them out of pennant contention. And so, the Cubs begin their second century without a World Series victory.
Alaska. The once-majestic state is looking very small, thanks to the various antics of its politicians - Mike Gravel, Ted Stevens, Don Young, and of course the Almighty Queen of the Last Frontier, noted book-banning wolf-killer Sarah Palin. (In the spirit of the holidays, I'll say something nice about the noted book-banning wolf-killer - she could have been a really great smooth jazz flutist if she hadn't been sidetracked into desk jobs.) The state's residents are going to have a hard time drumming up pride when they mark their fiftieth anniversary of statehood next Saturday.
Illinois. Then again, Alaska doesn't have a governor so slimy his hair can stay in place without gel, nor does it have an unsold - er, unfilled - Senate seat. Abraham Lincoln is spinning in his grave indeed.
John Edwards. Had the former North Carolina senator merely lost his bid for the Democratic presidential nomination, it would not have been humiliating - in fact, the failure of his antipoverty message reflected less on his failures as a politician and more on the average American voter's disregard for the poor (relax, Joe the Plumber, I'm not talking about you!). But his extramarital affair illustrated his failures as both a father and as a husband - his affair went on during the worst of Elizabeth Edwards's cancer battle. This son of mill worker's going to be toast.
NBC. If Tina Fey and Jay Leno weren't associated with this network, would anyone watch? The once-proud "Peacock Network," after years of poor sitcom pickups, an overreliance on veteran shows, gimmicky reality programming, and overhyped dramas, is mired in last place. Its sitcoms are qualified hits at best, and its drama lineup is so decimated it's surrendering the 10:00 Eastern time slot to a new show for Leno, which will render Conan O'Brien's takeover of "The Tonight Show" redundant and the insufferable Jimmy Fallon's takeover of "Late Night" even more so. (Well, there's a silver lining!) They're so desperate for ratings successes, they even let Rosie O'Donnell air a pilot for a variety show, even though no one has bothered with Rosie O'Donnell or variety shows in ages. True, NBC was in a similarly hapless state in the early eighties, but back then there wasn't a fourth network that lacked a nightly newscast and late-prime programming (that is, 10:00 Eastern) for the Not Broadcasting Competently network to lose the ratings battle to.
O.J. Simpson. Guess why.
And finally. . .
George W. Bush. The outgoing President is trying to burnish his legacy. And he still thinks people care.
That's it for 2008. Happy new year - I toss my shoe to you! :-D ;-)