Our Cup Runneth Dry

The United States men's national soccer team played the Netherlands this past Saturday in the round of sixteen at the World Cup and, as expected, lost. 3-1.  As Billy Joel would have said, they had the Midas touch . . . until they met the Dutch.

This raises a lot of questions.  How come we keep getting our hopes up with these lovable losers?  Why does the women's team always have to save our honor by winning their World Cup the year after?  Why did the Yanks blow so many scoring opportunities?  Who honestly thought they could beat the Dutch anyway?  And if the Dutch national color is orange, why do they have a red, white and blue flag that's virtually indistinguishable from Luxembourg's?

I keep hearing stories about how the U.S. Men's National Team has yet to peak, and that they could be real contenders in 2026, when the World Cup is held in North America (the United States, Canada and Mexico) and play mainly on their home turf.   All they need is a better striker, a stronger midfield lineup, and yada yada yada . . .

That's as may be.  American sports fans woke up Saturday morning excited about soccer and went to bed Sunday night after watching twelve hours of NFL games. 

UPSET!

What?  

The U.S. Men's National Team (USMNT) defeated Iran 1-0 in Tuesday's World Cup soccer match?

Okay, I admit it I was wrong about the men's national soccer team.  (I was also wrong when I said that the U.S. and Iran were in Group D when they're in Group B; sorry about that, I fixed it.) .  When I saw that game, I, as Bill Maher might say,  went from "God damn USMNT!" to "God damn, USMNT!" 😊 

The USMNT is the third youngest team in this World Cup tournament, and they have a lot of energy and heart that other teams lack.  Also a lot of grit, and it was that grit that enabled Christian Pulisic (below) to score the only goal in Tuesday's game.

I saw the game on a recording the day after it happened, and to be honest, I knew the result beforehand.  When my mother told me that one of the players had hurt himself badly, I thought to myself, "That happens, that's why they have subs."  When I found out it was Christian Pulisic who'd injured himself, I thought, "Oh, this team is going to lose the next game big time!"   Pulisic got hurt in scoring the game's only goal and colliding with the Iranian goalkeeper.  The idea of the team carrying on without Pulisic is the sports equivalent of when the Doors tried to carry on after Jim Morrison died.  

The U.S .plays the Netherlands on Saturday.  Pulisic, hospitalized with a pelvic contusion, says he should be back in shape by then.  That's a tall order, but we'll see if he's able as soon as he's better . . . and better as soon as he's able. 

The World Cup. Yippee. Whatever . . .

So am I going to watch the World Cup, which starts today in Qatar?  Aah, I'll probably watch some of it, but I'm not as excited about it as I've been in previous common even-numbered years.  maybe that's because I haven't watched any soccer in over two years.

COVID diminished my interest in elite sports, and the disastrous Beijing Winter Olympics this past February all but eliminated it.  In keeping with my recently acquired desire to scale back my involvement in things and quit some things altogether, I am not going to bother rooting for the American men's team, as they have long since become a joke.  CNN's Jake Tapper once mused about how they had made more money than the always-victorious U.S. women's team even though the men's team have been "less successful" in international competition, which is a nice way of saying that they suck, bite, chomp, blow and stink.  

At last the men's team actually got into the tournament after getting the green weenie in 2018. But the idea of seeing them win the World Cup this year (or any year)  is about as realistic as Martin O'Malley being elected President in 2024, and he actually has a plausible shot.

And besides, what's the point of winning when you get an ugly trophy like this?

This is the ugliest cup I've ever seen.

It isn't even a cup.