No Country For Old "Men?"

CBS is boasting about how its aging sitcom "Two And a Half Men," inexplicably in its ninth season, is the most watched show on American broadcast television. I've always disliked this show, but I could never find the right words to explain my dislike for it . . . until television critic Alan Sepinwall of the Newark Star-Ledger offered up the following adjectives to describe it - "skeevy," "misogynistic," and "lazily crude."  Perfect - that sums it up! And that's the reason Sepinwall makes the big money. 

CBS's boasting is likely based on the nearly 29 million viewers "Two And a Half Men" pulled in for the 2011-12 season premiere - i.e., the debut of Ashton Kutcher, who's an actor like Ashlee Simpson is a live performer.  Kutcher's character, Walden Schmidt, is a wealthy but dimwitted man-child who buys Charlie Harper's house after Charlie (played by guess-who) is killed in a freak accident. Charlie's brother Alan (Jon Cryer) asks to stay on for awhile, with the audience understanding that he isn't going to leave any time soon.  And, if you believe CBS's hype, none of these characters are going anywhere.

But maybe they are.  My mother is a fan of the show - don't ask me why, please don't - and she saw Kutcher's debut on the show. (I didn't.)  She doesn't think it's going to work out in the long run, and she thinks the  show will go down the tubes.  She can't understand the appeal of Walden, who lazily and stupidly falls into one lucky break after another - especially when it comes to attracting women.  And, if I understand my mother correctly, Walden makes Alan's idiot son Jake look like Aristotle. 

Sometimes a cast member change on a television show can re-invigorate the show.  "M*A*S*H," which once occupied the time slot on CBS that "Two And a Half Men" now occupies, was already a good show when Wayne Rogers and McLean Stevenson both left in 1975, but their respective replacements, Mike Farrell and Harry Morgan, turned a good sitcom into a great one.  But while "M*A*S*H" was a deep human comedy with a stellar ensemble cast, "Two And a Half Men" is a shallow, cheap-laugh show that revolves around two and a half actors (Ashton Kutcher is the half actor here).  Charlie Sheen's departure couldn't ruin the show, because it started out ruined.  The initial curiosity the show is benefiting from right now with regards to how Kutcher fits in will likely fade as the season progresses.  Bear this in mind too - this is the third of the three seasons "Two and A Half Men" was renewed for in advance back in 2009.  The network and the producers had to go ahead with it one way or another - even without Sheen (who already has CBS executive Leslie Moonves' money, dude), there was a lot of dough involved here.  If the ratings trail off by May, there really won't be any need to renew it for a tenth season.

But that might happen.  Yes, the show may be skeevy, misogynistic, and lazily crude, but if there's one thing I've noticed about Americans' TV viewing habits, there's a big market for skeeviness, woman-hating, and lazy crudity.  Just don't tell my mother I said that. ;-)