Beto Is Spanish For "Toast"

Actually, "brindis" is Spanish for "toast," so maybe we should call him Brindis O'Rourke.

This past Friday, Robert Francis O'Rourke, who was known as Beto to his friends and whose name was mud among most Democrats, announced his withdrawal from the 2020 Democratic presidential campaign.  His departure ends one of the least plausible presidential bids in recent American political history.

O'Rourke, the Texas political boy wonder who became a celebrity by coming extremely close to defeating incumbent Republican Ted Cruz for the U.S. Senate, was counting on his charisma, his youth, and his ability to reach out to minorities in general and Hispanics in particular to get him the Democratic presidential nomination.  Instead, he proved to be a cartoon Bobby Kennedy for what is increasingly becoming a cartoon republic, and he learned that being named Robert Francis simply isn't enough.  See, Bobby Kennedy had compiled a distinguished record as Senate counsel, Attorney General of the United States, and United States Senator from New York when he announced his campaign for the Presidency in 1968.  O'Rourke, on the other hand, was a former three-term congressman from El Paso whose biggest achievement in Washington was . . . well, if you give me a few months, I might be able to find it.

O'Rourke became an unperson almost as soon as he announced his candidacy for President in a video statement using gauzy, flowery inspirational language that would have made Marianne Williamson roll her eyes, with his wife Amy sitting by his side smiling and being silent like an auto show model.  Actually, auto show models - now called "product presenters" - now talk about the cars they're standing next to, so maybe that's an unfair comparison.  But the optics nauseated a lot of people and cost him half of the women's vote; he then lost the other half by flippantly commenting on how he didn't spend much time helping his wife raise their kids.  His subsequent appearance at campaign stops, where he would hop on tables to talk to crowds - crowds that got smaller with each campaign appearance to the point where they couldn't legitimately be called crowds anymore - showed an utter lack of discipline that terrified Democrats afraid of having such an undisciplined man as President.

Beto has been urged to run for the U.S. Senate in Texas again in 2020, but he has refused to do so.  For once, he made a smart move.  After he came out against tax exemptions for churches and for confiscating guns, he couldn't get elected to any office in Texas now - not even El Paso County recorder of deeds.  Had he been elected to the Senate in 2018, he might have been an asset to both Texas Democrats and to the national Democratic Party.  He may even have accomplished something.  Now he's just another also-ran.

The biggest loser of Beto's quixotic presidential campaign is probably Martin O'Malley, who foolishly eschewed a 2020 presidential run of his own and backed Beto for President even before O'Rourke announced he was running, And, despite O'Malley's insistence that he backed O'Rourke because of his stance in immigration, I have a feeling that the fact that they both have apostrophes in their surnames played a part in O'Malley's decision to endorse him.  Unlike Kamala Harris, I have a problem, guys, with identity politics, because supporting a candidate for office because you share that candidate's ethnicity is the dumbest reason to do so.  Me, I looked at Beto and realized that his Irishness was the best reason for me, an American of Irish origin, to join his campaign, which is why I didn't join it.  You're going to have to do more than just be Irish to get my support, and Beto never did.  On the other hand, maybe O'Malley is the biggest winner from Beto's failed run; now that Beto's out of the race, O'Malley has much more time to promote his new book.

Beto isn't the first golden boy to attempt a presidential bid, and he won't be the last.  I've seen them all, from Gary Hart, to Howard Dean, to John Edwards.  Like those earlier presidential canddiates who caused a great deal of buzz but didn't have the substance to back up their style ("Where's the beef?"), O'Rourke believed the hype surrounding him and continued to believe it after everyone else no longer did.  He was just another shooting star . . . and let me tell you, the Democratic Party cultivates more shooting stars than rising stars.