Tight A$

It's pretty much been conceded that the Republicans are going to win control of the Senate and strike the final blow against the rest of us by the end of 2016.  But, many progressives have said, the best chances for the Democrats to make gains are in the gubernatorial elections.  Yes, the Tea Party governors who got elected in 2010 are up for re-election now, and after their four years of fascism, they would be prime targets for voters pissed off about the way they've been getting screwed out of everything, including attempts to screw them out of their right to vote.

And given all that, that would be a plausible conclusion.  Michigan, Maine, Wisconsin, and Florida all have Tea Party governors running for re-election whom you would think would be in trouble for all the dick-dastardly deeds they've done.  But the Democrats, it turns out, are no better at ousting Tea Party governors than they are at ousting Mitch McConnell.  Tea Party governors in these states are pretty much in dead heats with their Democratic challengers and none of the Dems vying to replace them are even close to breaking out of the pack.  Why should they be?  They won't run with Obama, they won't run on Obamacare, they, being Democrats, don't want to take credit for any progressive ideas or ideals . . . no wonder voter turnout is expected to be low in November.  The only exception here is Charlie Crist in Florida, and he can't seem to put Rick Scott far back in his rear-view mirror.  These money-plagued races are as tight as they come.  And in Ohio, Republican Governor John Kasich is forecast to win in a landslide.  The only consolation for Democrats is in Pennsylvania, where the greatly despised Tom Corbett is expected to lose to Democrat Tom Wolf by double digits.

Meanwhile, governorships currently held by Democrats are increasingly vulnerable.  Not just Democratic Governor Pat Quinn in Illinois, but even governorships in New England. After handling an October ice storm, two cyclones, and Newtown - and signing a law requiring universal background checks for gun purchasers -  you'd think that Connecticut governor Dannel Malloy would be a shoo-in for re-election.  But no, he's locked in a tight race with Tom Foley, the Republican he narrowly defeated in 2010 and who's come back for another shot at the office because he thinks a narrow loss entitles him to try again.  (If it had been Malloy who narrowly lost, that would have been the last we'd heard of him.)  And in neighboring Massachusetts, where Democratic Governor Deval Patrick is retiring, Republican Charlie Baker has an excellent shot at defeating his Democratic challenger . . . Attorney General Martha Coakley.  How on earth is this possible?  Perhaps you weren't paying attention - we're talking about Martha Coakley!  A woman who has all the inviting warmth of a Kelvinator! 

Yeah, it looks like Democrats are about to blow these elections, elections in which the Republicans should be held accountable for all their crimes against humanity, and hopefully this will be the last we hear of . . . the Democrats.  They're a spent force.  They've lost their way, they don't fight for their beliefs, and they think they have a bright future because of changing racial demographics, which the Republicans are rendering irrelevant through voter suppression and Citizens United. And when the stupid reactionaries in this country take over, thank the stupid progressives who care more about political correctness than rebuilding our infrastructure, and thank also the stupid voters who fall for the GOP "smaller government" spiel hook, line and sinker.  The election returns should come as no surprise to foreigners for whom American stupidity is a topic of amusement . . . especially, I'm sure, my friends from England.

And as a famous English rock and roller once sang . . . why should I care . . . why . . . should I care?