Razzing the Night Away

I have the dubious distinction of having seen none of the movies that have been nominated for Best Picture at the Academy Awards, being handed out this evening in Hollywood, so I'm not qualified to comment on them.  (Although, I did see Blue Jasmine, and Cate Blanchett looks to be a shoo-in for Best  Actress.)   Besides, I'm here to comment on the movie awards I care about more - the Golden Raspberry Awards, or the Razzies, celebrating Hollywood at its absolute worst.  (Many cinematic historians say that Hollywood's last golden age ended in the late seventies, and the Razzies began in 1981.  Makes sense to me.)

The Razzies were held last night, and the "winner"  for Worst Picture was Movie 43, a sketch comedy anthology with a big-name cast including some of the best actors of today - and Richard Gere, who was wise enough to try to get out of this movie, though not wise enough to try to do so before it was too late.  Love At Twenty it ain't; it's a montage of sexually and scatologically graphic scenes that attempts to take the gross-out genre to a new level.  According to those who had the apparent (very apparent) misfortune of seeing it, it succeeds completely.  The only good thing about Movie 43 may be the cast.  It features a cast that includes but is not limited to Elizabeth Banks, Kristen Bell, Halle Berry, Leslie Bibb, Kate Bosworth, Gerard Butler, Josh Duhamel, Anna Faris, the aforementioned Richard Gere, Terrence Howard, Hugh Jackman, Johnny Knoxville, Justin Long (remember him from "Ed"?), Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Dennis Quaid, Liev Schreiber, Seann William Scott, Emma Stone, Jason Sudeiki, Uma Thurman, Naomi Watts, and the undeniably talented Kate Winslet.  This is a sturdier list than the cast of the original Cannonball Run movie, but then Terry Bradshaw is too classy a guy to get involved in something like this.  (Don't ask me to explain the title.  Movie 43?  Sounds like a Jethro Tull song.)   

Oh yeah, Movie 43 won worst director awards for the baker's dozen of people who directed its different sketches.  Thirteen, in this case, really is an unlucky number.  So is 43.

Will Smith and his son Jaden picked up worst actor awards for the sci-fi futuristic flick After Earth, with the junior Smith earning the worst actor award and Dad picking up the worst supporting actor "prize."  This is a shame, as I have a long admiration and fondness for Will Smith, mainly because he's an engaging entertainer, he's from Philadelphia (where my father's family came from), and he and his musical partner Jeffrey "Jazzy Jeff" Townes recorded "Parents Just Don't Understand," the only rap song I ever liked.  But at least Smith père and fils aren't associated with worst remake/sequel winner The Lone Ranger, a movie about a character that hasn't been hip since the sixties.  Away at last, Silver.

Oh yeah, Tyler Perry actually won worst actress for reprising his female character Madea in A Madea Christmas.  Dude, your schtick is getting old.  Seen Martin Lawrence as Big Momma lately?

I'm already looking forward to next year's Razzies. Because, given Hollywood's capacity for mass-producing great quantities of junk, that means an embarrassing embarrassment of Razzie riches to celebrate in 2015! :-D