My Second (And Hopefully Last) Open Letter To Anthony Weiner

Dear Tony:

You texted lewd photos of yourself again?

And you did so after  - long after - your resignation from the U.S. House of Representatives?  Even after you were supposedly "cured" of your addiction to "sexting?" And as recently as this March?

Why are you still running for mayor of New York?

Some of us were rooting for you, Tony, because we believed you when you said you were a changed man and you had worked everything out with your wife, and yet you were still engaging in your naughty Internet habit - and under an inexplicable pseudonym - all that time? And just exactly how are New Yorkers supposed to believe that you will focus on the issues as the city's mayor? More importantly, how will people ever trust to tell the truth about anything ever again?   And, given the fact that you didn't stop showing yourself off long after you said you did, how can you possibly represent New York to America and the world in the same, dignified way that Michael Bloomberg has done for twelve years? 

Look, Tony, we all make mistakes, but your mistake was getting back into public life after failing to completely get your private life in order.  And yes, I know a lot of people get sexual thrills in perverse ways.  But they usually get their thrills watching someone else do something lewd.  I know we're in a new era, where Republicans like David Vitter and Mark Sanford can confess to inappropriate sexual behavior and survive politically, and even your fellow New Yorker Eliot Spitzer has made a political comeback after his indiscretion, so we're becoming more like France - now if we could only have sophisticated cuisine and intelligent movies - but even Gerard Depardieu must be looking at you now and saying, "Sacré merde, l'homme!"            

I should have known you had a megalomaniacal streak in you, Tony, a streak that demonstrated your obnoxious self-absorption and your insensitivity to your wife and son and your disregard for how embarrassed your soon-to-be ex-supporters must feel.  That's why I like Eliot Spitzer.  Going from the governorship of the state of New York to running for New York City comptroller may seem like John Quincy Adams running for a seat on the Braintree town council instead of running for a congressional seat after leaving the White House.  But Spitzer is starting over small and running for an office where he can put his financial talents to good use.  Your'e asking the voters of New York City - a city with more residents than most states - to elect you as their chief executive.  You got a lot damn gall to try to go for America's second-toughest job after you couldn't cut it as a congressman.  You say you're a man of the people, Tony, but I can't recall any legislation you ever promoted or advanced in the House.  I do, however, remember you talking too much.

And by the way, how is it you always manage to make the most inappropriate news at the most inopportune times?  President Obama is dealing with a reactionary element in Congress that threatens to destroy him, the Democratic Party, and the nation - in that order - over the coming debt ceiling and budget fights, and we're paying attention to you instead of something far more important.  

If you get elected mayor of New York, Tony, you'll be one of the most visible Democrats in the nation, and the Republicans would love to point to someone like you as emblematic of the Democratic Party.  You'll be the seen as quintessential big-city New York cultural deviant.  Oh, wait - you already are! You're someone to laugh at, not with.

So please do us all a favor, Tony, and get out of the New York City mayoral race.  You're a disgrace to the Democratic Party and the democratic process.  And you're a disgrace to New York.  No, I'm not a New York City resident, and I have no plans to become one, but I do go into the city a good deal, and I don't look forward to the prospect of seeing a "Welcome To New York City: Anthony Weiner, Mayor" sign and feeling like I need a shower.  

On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia. 

Stupefyingly yours, Steven Maginnis

P.S.  I'm so glad we in New Jersey have Cory Booker to look up to.