And So We Leave the Little Town of London, England

The Olympics are officially over, which means I don't have to comment on the Summer Games again for another four years.  I think I overdid it this time.  But it was still fun to watch the London Olympics  on TV and to satirize them here.  God save the Queen.

I'd like to thank everyone who inspired me to cover these Games for your enjoyment: Paul McCartney, for his particularly inspiring performance of "Hey Jude" at the opening ceremony; Mary Carillo, for her spectacularly pointless and unintentionally hilarious report on bagpipe playing; Morgan Freeman, whose voice-overs in the Visa ads kept me awake during commercial breaks; Michelle Obama, for averting a diplomatic incident in London after Mitt Romney left town by simply being herself, and; NBC's promotional department, for taking the opportunity to push its reality programming and its new fall lineup and giving me a whole list of shows to avoid.

Special gratitude goes to the athletes who made these Games memorable: Michael Phelps, for starting out modestly and finishing both the swimming events and his own Olympic career with a bang; Allyson Felix, who got the women's 200-meter track gold medal on her third try; Gabby Douglas, for continuing a women's all-around gymnastics gold medal tradition in America that didn't even exist before 2004 (Mary Lou Retton notwithstanding); John Orozco, for his inspiring story; American soccer starlet Alex Morgan, for being hot; Jessica Ennis, for being hot and British, and; the male divers, for giving women like my friend on Facebook some eye candy.

Thanks also to the Mexican men's soccer team for sticking it to Brazil.  The Brazilian team is the New York Yankees of international soccer; they think they own the sport.  But you, Team Mexico, beat them for the gold medal.  Thank you - muchas gracias! That showed 'em, those self-absorbed, single-named poseurs! You guys rock!

Special recognition goes to foreign athletes like South African runner Oscar Pistorious, for his breakthrough for disabled athletes everywhere; also, I'd like to acknowledge Lithuanian swimmer Ruta Meilutyte, an underdog who won a gold medal, and Irish boxer Katie Taylor, who won a gold medal representing an underdog country, the land of my forefathers.  These are two athletes from two little countries . . . and they made very big impacts.

Among the British athletes, I'd also like to recognize Bradley Wiggins, the multiple medalist in Olympics cycling and this year's Tour de France winner, for getting good and drunk after winning his gold medal in the men's cycling time trial despite heavy criticism.  Dude, you know how to party!        

No thanks to closing ceremony director Kim Gavin for the Spice Girls reunion. :-p

Therisa Barber, Claire Elizabeth Barratt, and Ed Charlton, all of whom are friends of mine and are British nationals living in America, could not make it home to the mother country to watch the Olympics in person, so hopefully they read some of this blog and felt like they were there anyway, just as I'd hoped to make my Canadian friend Mackenzie Reide feel at home while in America when the 2010 Winter Olympics were held in her hometown of Vancouver.  I dedicate my commentary to them - especially Ed, who gets my humor.  Note to Therisa, Claire and Ed: Yes, I may have been impudent in relishing the idea, and then the reality, of "A Soldier's Song" being played in London, but . . . well, it's an Irish thing. Sorry if you don't understand.

Finally, I'd like to say something to my all-time favorite female athlete, swimmer Janet Evans, whose name I could not help but keep bringing up in the past two weeks despite the fact that she last competed at the Olympics in 1996, and I'd like to say it in the second person.  I just wanted you to know, Miss Evans - uh, can I call you Janet? - that I honestly did not know you were vying for a comeback in London, and had I known you were doing so, I most certainly would have followed your efforts.  You, Janet, may have no regrets, but I  obviously do.  But I also wanted to say this: I know you felt that you let people down when Dagmar Hase got the better of you in that 400-meter freestyle race in the Barcelona Olympics and you had to settle for silver.  I know you had a good cry after being eliminated from the final of that same race in Atlanta - hey, it shows you're human, doesn't it? - and you told Hannah Storm then that you'd had the feeling that you let people down, and you may even feel the same way now after your comeback stalled. I'd like to respond to that, and with a reply comprised of only four words:

Let me down? Never.  :-)

I've been waiting sixteen years to say that.

Now - what finally happened with Anne Romney's horse? :-D

On to 2016. Rio, Rio, flying down to Rio . . .