Be Very Afraid

Michele Bachmann is running for President.

That's the second scariest six-word sentence in the English language: Michele Bachmann is running for President.

The scariest six-word sentence in the English language would be this: Michele Bachmann has been elected President.

This dame makes Sarah Palin look like Margaret Chase Smith. Can you imagine America's fist female President to be a Tea Party Republican who equates President Obama's private-public hybrid health care law with socialism? How about a woman who thinks carbon dioxide is harmless? Or a woman who thought Lexington and Concord took place in New Hampshire? Okay, history isn't her best subject, you may say, and besides, she actually got her history right, she just screwed up her geography. Well, remember when she said the Founding Fathers worked tirelessly to eradicate slavery, like John Quincy Adams - who did work tirelessly to eradicate slavery but was not a Founding Father and died before slavery was eradicated?

And she advocates home schooling?

Or how about when she announced her presidential campaign in her hometown of Waterloo, Iowa yesterday and said she felt a kindred spirit with noted Waterloo favorite son John Wayne? Except that John Wayne was born in Winterset, Iowa on the other end of the state. But a similarly named fellow was a resident of Waterloo, Iowa - John Wayne Gacy, the serial killer who dressed as a clown and murdered 33 boys.

There was a dangerous clown in Waterloo, Iowa yesterday. Her name was Michele Bachmann.

Chris Matthews admires Bachmann's authenticity and loyal following and says the Democrats could be in trouble without any women in visible, politically powerful positions going into 2012. What? Because Chris Matthews is a women's rights advocate like Newt Gingrich is a family man, you really have to do a double take to consider what Matthews is suggesting - that Bachmann could appeal to soccer moms just because she's a woman. It's even more frightening that people support Bachmann because she's an idiot; her mistakes actually endear her supporters to her because she's like a member of their family to them. Namely, the crazy aunt in the attic.

Bachmann's chances? Small. No sitting House of Representatives member, like Bachmann is, has been elected President since James Garfield in 1880.

We should be glad she won re-election to the House in 2010. She'd have more time as a private citizen to devote to her campaign in she hadn't.