Sunday, June 7, 2026

Sweet Home Albania

While Trump wreaks havoc over what's left of our government (and making it that much easier to break up the country into smaller independent states, as there won't be much of a government left) and remodels and destroys the White House beyond recognition (another reason it will be easier to dissolve the Union), Ivanka Trump is making her own little investment in real estate (sorry, I have no parenthetical clause to offer here about breaking up the country).   

Ivanka came upon this marvelous little island, two square miles large, in the Mediterranean Sea, off the coast of Albania.  Oops!  Correction: Contrary to Ivanka's insistence, this island is in the Adriatic Sea.  Anyway, she thought it would make a nice place to take up residence and build a grand luxury resort looking out on the Mediterranean - I mean, the Adriatic. 

While a lot of MAGA Republicans have nothing wrong with Ivanka buying an island off the coast of Albania in the Gulf of America near Mobile (see what I did there?) the Albanian people are livid, as the island, Sazan, is a former military installation in the Soviet satellite area, with many tunnels and pillboxes still intact, that is now a wildlife refuge.  The prime minister of Albania, elected on a promise to rid the government of corruption, approved the deal for this proposed resort, which is being spearheaded by Affinity Partners, the investment firm founded by . . . Jared Kushner. 

Ivanka vowed not to get involved in politics after her father set out to regain the White House, but her husband's deal with a corrupt leader, which has sparked demonstrations all across Albania, and her own enthusiasm for this project have landed her dead center in what has already become a global controversy.  Benito Mussolini may have actually caused less consternation when he invaded Albania in April 1939.   The resort is bound to cause a great deal of environmental destruction on Sazan Island, undermining its significance as a marine sanctuary, and the jobs it will create will mainly be jobs in which Albanian domestic workers tend to the whims of wealthy American real-estate con men, a third of which will be named Trump, a third of which will be named Kushner, and a third of which are likely to be an assortment of other names from the Epstein files.    

There's only one thing Ivanka and Jared can do to stop this controversy - give up the project.  Don't even scale it down to a respectable size.  Just give up on this Albania getaway.  The only way for them  to please Albanians is to just get down and leave and walk away.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ugh, everything they touch dies.