If It's Tuesday, We're Being Spat On In Belgium

A recent poll taken among Western countries revealed two facts, one unsurprising, the other eye-opening. The United States, of course, is the only country where a majority of people - 57 percent - have a favorable opinion of George W. Bush. But the same poll also found that a majority of folks in France, Germany, and Spain have low opinions of Americans as a whole. Which means that if you're planning to go to Paris, Berlin, or Madrid for a vacation, here are one of three things you should do:

1. Prepare to be bitch-slapped.

2. Pretend you're Canadian.

3. Or, instead, go to Canada, as 80 percent of all Canadians still have a favorable opinion of us. And this is despite all the acid rain we send them.

The poll didn't ask Americans to rate themselves and their fellow citizens, but it would have been interesting to see just how many Americans had the guts to express an unfavorable opinion of their own country. Many already have.

It's hard for some Americans not to have an unfavorable opinion of their country, a country that declares its values by re-electing as its President, by a popular majority, a self-assured spoiled-rich-kid / nincompoop whose ideas include cutting taxes for the rich in a time of war and privatizing ("We said, Don't call it that!" - Republican National Committee) Social Security and integrating it with the stock market, who refuses to admit to making mistakes, who turns a blind eye and a deaf ear to global crises like greenhouse gas emissions, and who clings to an eighth-grade civics-class mentality suggesting that democracy can be exported to cultures that have no democratic traditions - even if it's by the end of a bayonet.